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Favorite Social Media Channel

Favorite Social Media Channel pX6lm
The pie chart provides information about the percentages of the most social media channel uses from 2011 to 2013. In general, it can be seen that Facebook took a lion share in the chart and it seemed to follow a downward trend throughout the period. Meanwhile, all other social media channels enjoyed greater popularity. Both Facebook and Google user have dramatically change through three years. The percentages of Facebook was about 38%, decreased 21% in 2013 compared with 2011. Whereas, Google changed significantly to 14% in 2013. In contrast, other channels experienced the minor increasing in the same period. There was slight rises from 10% to 12% and 15% for Linkedln, and 21% to 23% to 25% for Twitter relatively. The percentage of Pinterest consumers was the lowest, which made up only a little percent in 2011, 2012, 2013 relatively.
The pie chart provides information about the percentages of the most social media channel
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
uses
from 2011 to 2013.

In general
, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that Facebook took a lion share in the chart and it seemed to follow a downward trend throughout the period. Meanwhile, all other social media channels enjoyed greater popularity.

Both Facebook and Google user have
dramatically
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
through three years. The percentages of Facebook
You should probably use: "were".
was
about 38%, decreased 21% in 2013 compared with 2011.
“Whereas” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Whereas
, Google
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
significantly
to 14% in 2013.

In contrast
, other channels experienced the minor increasing in the same period.
Did you mean "There were slight rises"?
There was slight rises
from 10% to 12% and 15% for
Possible spelling mistake found.
Linkedln
, and 21% to 23% to 25% for Twitter
relatively
. The percentage of Pinterest consumers was the lowest, which made up
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
percent in 2011, 2012, 2013
relatively
.
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IELTS academic Favorite Social Media Channel

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
140 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
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