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Fula production in Eourope in 1981 and 2000

Fula production in Eourope in 1981 and 2000 0MWxG
a glance at the graph reveals the amount of three types of main fuel( petroleum, coal and natural gas) which was produced in a European country between 1981 to 2000. Overall, it can be seen that the production of petroleum was far higher than other fuels throughout the whole time frame, though the fluctuations trend. To begin, at the start of the period the production of petroleum fluctuate approximately at the same amount of around 130, exept last year which experienced a slight decline by around 10 Tonnes. On contrary, the natural gas have remained at 40 Tonnes for a long time before it reaches to its peaks at around 85 Tonnes. With regards to the amount of coal produced, it began with around at 80 Tonnes before the falling dramatically to about 50 Tonnes, The figure then have been witnessed a slight increase before it continued to decrease over the last period. To sum up, though it’s production went up bad down, petroleum was always the largest level of fuel production. Also, although the fluctuations of coal amount and the remaining of natural gas they both reach at the same point at approximately 50 Tonnes which far exceeded by natural gas with a about 35 Tonnes.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
a
glance at the graph reveals the
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amount
of three types of main fuel
Don't put a space after the opening parenthesis
(
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
petroleum
, coal and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gas)
which
was produced
in a European country
Use "between" + "and" not "to." Try this: "between 1981 and 2000".
between 1981 to 2000
.

Overall
, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
production
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
petroleum
was far higher than other fuels throughout the whole time frame, though the fluctuations trend.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
, at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
of the period the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
production
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
petroleum
fluctuate approximately at the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
around
130,
Possible spelling mistake found.
exept
last year which experienced a slight decline by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
around
10 Tonnes.

On contrary, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gas
have remained at 40 Tonnes for a long time
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
it reaches to its peaks at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
around
85 Tonnes.

Use "in regard to", "with regard to", or more simply "regarding".
With regards to
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of coal produced, it began with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
around
at 80 Tonnes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
the falling
dramatically
to about 50 Tonnes, The figure then have
been witnessed
a slight increase
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
it continued to decrease over the last period.

To sum up, though it’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
production
went up
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
down,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
petroleum
was always the largest level of fuel
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
production
.
Also
, although the fluctuations of coal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
and the remaining of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gas
they both reach at the same point at approximately 50 Tonnes which far exceeded by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
natural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gas
with
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
about 35 Tonnes.
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IELTS academic Fula production in Eourope in 1981 and 2000

Academic
  American English
6 paragraphs
207 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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