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Factors affecting work performance.

Factors affecting work performance. GJwEL
The following bar chart report presents statistics regarding factors that affect the work performance of two different age groups of 18-30 and 45-60 in the company. A general perspective finds that a percentage of a chance for personal development as well as a relaxed working environment along with promotion prospects is comparatively way higher for the workers of the age between 18-30 than the workers with 45-60 aged workers. A specific analysis reveals that team spirit for both the age group is similar approximately 50%. The percentage of Factors that affect the workers of age group 18-30, a chance for developing the personal personality for the adults is 65% more than the age group of 45-60 people. Similarly, looking at the graphic, 18-30 aged workers get more affected from the relaxed working environment near about 40% more than 45-60 aged people. followed by job security (40%) and promotion prospects(75%). On the other hand, money is equally greatest affecting factor for their work performance at about 70% Along with work environment with the equal affecting factors that are 25%, Besides that, for job satisfaction, adult workers get slightly more affected by job satisfaction. Respect from colleagues along with a competent boss percentage for these factors remains unchanged. From the overall perspective, team spirit, Money, And personal development impacted the highest on the work performance of both age groups. On the other hand, the work environment has the least affected their work performance.
The following bar chart report presents statistics regarding
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factors
that affect the
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work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
performance
of two
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
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age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
groups
of 18-30 and 45-60 in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
.

A general perspective finds that a percentage of a chance for personal development
as well
as a relaxed working
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environment
along with promotion prospects is
comparatively
way higher for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
between 18-30 than the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
with 45-60 aged workers.

A specific analysis reveals that team spirit for both the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
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group
is similar approximately 50%. The percentage of
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Factors
that affect the
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workers
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
18-30, a chance for developing the personal personality for the adults is 65% more than the
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age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
of 45-60
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.
Similarly
, looking at the graphic, 18-30 aged
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workers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
from the relaxed working
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environment
near about 40% more than 45-60 aged
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
followed
by job security (40%) and promotion prospects(75%).

On the other hand
, money is
equally
A determiner is probably missing here: "the greatest".
greatest
affecting
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factor
for their
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work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
performance
at about 70% Along with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
with the equal affecting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factors
that are 25%,
Besides
that, for job satisfaction, adult
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workers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
slightly
more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
by job satisfaction. Respect from colleagues along with a competent boss percentage for these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
factors
remains unchanged.

From the
overall
perspective, team spirit, Money, And personal development impacted the highest on the
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work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
performance
of both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
groups
.
On the other hand
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
has the least
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
performance
.
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IELTS academic Factors affecting work performance.

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
241 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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