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energy consuption in usa from 1980 to 2030

energy consuption in usa from 1980 to 2030 RV8op
In this designated bar graph we illustrate that the telephone calls occur in the uk which is mainly divided into three categories. On the y-axis, we demonstrate the number of minutes which is in millions and on the x-axis, we represent the field In which it is split up such as local calls, national and international and mobile calls from the year 1995 to 2002. It is quite clear from the given bar graph that uk telephone calls in the area of local calls begin with 71% in 1995 then we meticulously sees that the local calls show's a magnificent incline till the year 1999. However, it started representing a significant downturn in the local calls from 91% in 1999 to 72% in 2002. Overall, the number of telephone calls in the scope of national and international calls in uk started with 38% in 1995 then it portrays a notable growth from 38% to 60% in 2002. In the same manner, the mobile calls in the uk indicate an upturn from 3% in 1995 to the year 1999 with 12% after 1999 it took a drastically jump of 45% till the year of 2002. Thus to conclude, the telephone calls in the uk in the section of local calls show's a prominent bounce but then it turns to a decline till the year 2002. Although the other branches like mobile, national and international calls depict a wonderful growth from the start. Still, mobile calls sketching a rapid development in the wing
In this designated bar graph we illustrate that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
telephone
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
calls
occur in the
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uk
which is
mainly
divided into three categories. On the y-axis, we demonstrate the number of minutes which is in millions and on the x-axis, we represent the field In which it
is split
up such as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
calls
, national and international and mobile
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calls
from the
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year
1995 to 2002.

It is quite
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
from the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
bar graph that
Possible spelling mistake found.
uk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
telephone
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
calls
in the area of
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local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
calls
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with 71% in 1995 then we
meticulously
The pronoun 'we' must be used with a non-third-person form of a verb: "see"
sees
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
calls
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
's a magnificent incline till the
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year
1999.
However
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
representing a significant downturn in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
calls
from 91% in 1999 to 72% in 2002.

Overall
, the number of
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telephone
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calls
in the scope of national and international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
calls
in
Possible spelling mistake found.
uk
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
with 38% in 1995 then it portrays a notable growth from 38% to 60% in 2002. In the same manner, the mobile
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calls
in the
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uk
indicate an upturn from 3% in 1995 to the
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year
1999 with 12% after 1999 it took a
You used an adverb ('drastically') instead of an adjective, or a noun ('jump') instead of another adjective.
drastically jump
of 45% till the
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year
of 2002.

Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Thus
to conclude
, the
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telephone
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
calls
in the
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uk
in the section of
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local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
calls
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
's a prominent bounce
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but
then it turns to a decline till the
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year
2002. Although the other branches like mobile, national and international
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calls
depict a wonderful growth from the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
.
Still
, mobile
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calls
sketching a rapid development in the wing
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IELTS academic energy consuption in usa from 1980 to 2030

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
250 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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