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energy consuption from 1985 to 2003

energy consuption from 1985 to 2003 Nl6Lj
The chart depicts information regarding the percentage of the energy produced from different sources in a country from 1985 to 2003. Over the period of time, oil was the major source of energy production. While other renewable resources was the least consumed. It is clearly visible that oil and nuclear energy showed a downward trend. Oil was vastly used for energy production with roughly 52% in 1985. It fell, reaching up to 39% in 2003. It is followed by nuclear energy with 22% in 1985, which is the second main source. Then, it decreased by 5. 1 approximately. However, Hydrogen was only source whose consuption remain same with 4% in both years. On the contrary, other renewable, natural gases coal illustrated an upward trend. Natural gas was used nearly 13% It rose in 2003 by 10%. Coal also increased from 8% to 17%. Despite, being the least used resource with 1% in 1985 it, showed the most growth.
The chart depicts information regarding the percentage of the
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energy
produced from
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different
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sources
in a country from 1985 to 2003. Over the period of time, oil was the major
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source
of
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energy
production.
“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
other renewable resources was the least consumed. It is
clearly
visible that oil and nuclear
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energy
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
a downward trend. Oil was
vastly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for
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energy
production with roughly 52% in 1985. It fell, reaching up to 39% in 2003. It
is followed
by nuclear
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energy
with 22% in 1985, which is the second main
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source
. Then, it decreased by 5. 1 approximately.
However
, Hydrogen was
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only
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source
whose
Possible spelling mistake found.
consuption
remain same with 4% in both years.
On the contrary
, other renewable, natural gases coal illustrated an upward trend. Natural gas was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
nearly
13% It rose in 2003 by 10%. Coal
also
increased from 8% to 17%. Despite, being the least
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
resource with 1% in 1985 it,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
the most growth.
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IELTS academic energy consuption from 1985 to 2003

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
158 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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