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discuss the changes of ownership in electrical appliances and amount of house work during these years.

discuss the changes of ownership in electrical appliances and amount of house work during these years. GJBBj
The changes in owning electrical appliances and the time spent doing the house chores of a household in one nation from 1920 to 2019 is shown by the chart. The amount of appliances are in percent and the house work hours is per week. Overall, people are spending less and less time doing house hold tasks as the number of electrical items they have increases. Ownership of three electrical appliances of washing machine, refrigerator and vacuum cleaner are discussed by 3 lines. The amount of vacuum cleaners and refrigerators purchased rises dramatically during these years while buying washing machines peaks in 1960 and then sees a slight decrease and tries to increase marginally again in 2019. The number of indivitauls owning a refrigerator was zero in 1920 as only 30 percent owned vacuum cleaners and 40 percent had washing machines. In this year 50 hours were the average amount of workload a house needed. As we pass by in the year 1960 the amount of households owning washing machines and vacuum cleaners are the same and is about surprisingly 60 percent of them. This is also the highest percent of washing machines in houses during these years. In the recent years of 2019 and even in 2000 the amount of sold refrigerators and vacuum cleaners are the same and in the maximum amount of possible which is incredibly 100 percent of households. Unbelievebly roughly around 70 percent of these houses have washing machines and this amount has not increases noticebly during the 19 years period from 2000 to 2019. Also people have to spend just 10 hours per week for taking care of their house duties.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in owning electrical appliances and the time spent doing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
chores of a household in one nation from 1920 to 2019
is shown
by the chart. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of appliances
Possible agreement error. Did you mean "is"? (Some collective nouns can be treated as both singular and plural, so 'are' is not always incorrect.)
are
in
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percent
and the
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house
work hours is per week.

Overall
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are spending less and less time doing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
hold tasks as the number of electrical items they have increases. Ownership of three electrical appliances of washing
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machine
,
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refrigerator
and
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vacuum
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cleaner
are discussed
by 3 lines. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vacuum
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cleaners
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
refrigerators
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchased
rises
dramatically
during these years while buying washing
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machines
peaks in 1960 and then
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sees
a slight decrease and tries to increase
marginally
again in 2019.

The number of
Possible spelling mistake found.
indivitauls
owning a
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refrigerator
was zero in 1920 as
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only
30
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percent
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
owned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vacuum
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cleaners
and 40
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
had washing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
machines
. In this
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year
50 hours were the average
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of workload a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
needed. As we pass by in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
1960 the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of households owning washing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
machines
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vacuum
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cleaners
are the same and is about
surprisingly
60
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percent
of them. This is
also
the highest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
of washing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
machines
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
houses
during these years.

In the recent years of 2019 and even in 2000 the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of sold
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
refrigerators
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
vacuum
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cleaners
are the same and in the maximum
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
of possible which is
incredibly
100
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
of households.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Unbelievebly
roughly around 70
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
houses
have washing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
machines
and this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
amount
has not increases
Possible spelling mistake found.
noticebly
during the 19 years period from 2000 to 2019.
Also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
spend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
10 hours per week for taking care of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
duties.
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IELTS academic discuss the changes of ownership in electrical appliances and amount of house work during these years.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
276 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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