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Describe the number of literate people by gender

Describe the number of literate people by gender r1VNl
The bar graph illustrated the number of literate people by gender in seven different regions in 2011, and the figures are depicted in percentage. Overall, it can be seen that the difference between the highest and the lowest literacy rate of males and females was 30% to 40%. By looking at the first data, it is obviously that there was a minor difference between the two genders in Central Asia, Central Europe, Pacific and all of their rates were accounted for above 95, which two first regions peaked at 100. In the Latin America/Caribbean and Arab states, the rate of female literacy decreased to around 80 and 90, respectively. While the last two regions, the rate of literate men declined 25, and the rate of women fell by approximate 60.
The bar graph illustrated the number of literate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
by gender in seven
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
regions in 2011, and the figures
are depicted
in percentage.
Overall
, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that the difference between the highest and the lowest literacy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
of males and females was 30% to 40%.

By looking at the
first
data, it is
obviously
that there was a minor difference between the two genders in Central Asia, Central Europe, Pacific and all of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rates
were accounted
for above 95, which two
first
regions peaked at 100. In the Latin America/Caribbean and Arab states, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
of female literacy decreased to around 80 and 90,
respectively
. While the last two regions, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
of literate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
declined 25, and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
of women fell by approximate 60.
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IELTS academic Describe the number of literate people by gender

Academic
  American English
2 paragraphs
130 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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