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Anthropology job after five years from graduate

Anthropology job after five years from graduate oVd2V
The chart below illustrate the what student do after finishing their undergraduate degree in Anthropology for five years in one university with the salaries for work after five years. first of all, It's clearly that full-time work have the highest percentage 52%, the second highest ratio for part time work it's 15%, the third percentage for unemployed with 12%, then came full time postgrad study with unknown work with the same ratio 8%, and last but not least part time work with postgrad study is 5% the lowest percentage. In the salaries table we see there is a little different between freelance consultants and government sector in the salaries that above 75 thousands dollars, Private companies is making less salaries with comparison with others employments, 10% of worker get 25000-49999$ which is higher 5% from others employments, 35% of graduates gets 50000-74999$ with different 20% from others employments, but the percentage is lesser for salaries that above 75000$.
The chart below illustrate the what student do after finishing their undergraduate degree in Anthropology for five years in one university with the
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salaries
for
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work
after five years.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
first of all
, It's
clearly
that full-time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
have the highest percentage 52%, the second highest ratio for
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
part time
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work
it's 15%, the third percentage for unemployed with 12%, then came full time
Possible spelling mistake found.
postgrad
study with unknown
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work
with the same ratio 8%, and last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not least
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
part time
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work
with
Possible spelling mistake found.
postgrad
study is 5% the lowest percentage.

In the
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salaries
table we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
there is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
between freelance consultants and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
sector in the
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salaries
that above 75 thousands dollars, Private
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
is making
Did you mean "fewer"? The noun salaries is countable.
less
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salaries
with comparison with others employments, 10% of worker
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
25000-
The currency mark is usually put at the beginning of the number: "$49999".
49999$
which is higher 5% from others employments, 35% of graduates
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
50000-
The currency mark is usually put at the beginning of the number: "$74999".
74999$
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
20% from others employments,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the percentage is lesser for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salaries
that above
The currency mark is usually put at the beginning of the number: "$75000".
75000$
.
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IELTS academic Anthropology job after five years from graduate

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
158 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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