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Describe population trends in Japan. Use the data from the graph as evidence to support your claims. Suggest the potential impact on the country if the 2050 projections are correct.

Describe population trends in Japan. Use the data from the graph as evidence to support your claims. Suggest the potential impact on the country if the 2050 projections are correct. VEqom
At present world is experiencing dramatic demographic changes, according to World Health Organization ageing population will increase and percentage of people aged 60 years and older will almost be double by 2050. Improved health care system, healthy diet, active life style and personal hygiene awareness have largely contributed to increase life expectancy. Japan being the third largest economic country is facing shrinking population due to rapid rise in aging. This constant rise in aged population leads to negative implications on economic growth, health cost and labor force. The bar chart illustrates Japan’s population changes among three aged groups from 1950 and its projection to 2050. It is clear from data that the population of aged 0-14 was around 20 million in 1950 which gradually declines and will be almost half by 2050. On the other hand, working group (age 15 – 64) follows a fluctuated pattern with highest proportion in 2010 which is predicted to drop slightly drops to 52 million by 2050 compared to 60 million in 1950. However, population of 65+ people a steady rise between 1950 and 2020 and is predicted to grow considerably by 2050. A major problem that arises from ageing population is funding welfare system (pension and health care). Government will need to allocate more pension if retired people continue to rise. Likewise, more aged people place pressure on health care system as a consequence it implies burden on working age group. As long as, ageing population increases working group will pay higher taxes that state will assign for health expenditure and public pensions. This will further strain government to expand funds on other sectors. In short, significantly higher aged population and shrinking working group leads to pension and health care system crisis. Ageing population impose detrimental impact on economic growth primarily by age related inflation. If a specific age group consumes more services and goods than its produces, this results in age related inflation. This occurs mostly in countries with a high percentage of aged people or prisoners. The state therefore face price increasing effect. In contrast, price of goods reduces provided that production is more than its consumption. Thus, ageing population dampens economic growth. Another negative impact associated with ageing population is decline of labor force. A surge of older people leads to shortage of working age group which ultimately influence growth of business. Worker supply is directly related to demand, if supply is less it would be difficult for business to fill demand. Moreover, if demand is not fulfilled it will adversely affect productivity, hampers business expansion, higher labor cost and reduces competitiveness at international level. In nutshell, ageing population hinders business growth by declining labor force.
At present world is experiencing dramatic demographic
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changes
, according to World
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Health
Organization
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ageing
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population
will increase and percentage of
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people
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aged
60 years and older will almost be double by 2050.
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Improved
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health
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care
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system
, healthy diet, active life style and personal hygiene awareness have
largely
contributed to increase life expectancy. Japan being the third largest
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economic
country is facing shrinking
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population
due to rapid
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rise
in aging. This constant
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rise
in
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aged
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population
leads to
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negative
implications on
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economic
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growth
,
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health
cost and
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labor
force.

The bar chart illustrates Japan’s
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population
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changes
among three
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aged
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groups
from 1950 and its projection to 2050. It is
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clear
from data that the
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population
of
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aged
0-14 was around 20 million in 1950 which
gradually
declines and will be almost half by 2050.
On the other hand
,
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working
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group
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(age
15 – 64) follows a fluctuated pattern with
A determiner is probably missing here: "the highest".
highest
proportion in 2010 which
is predicted
to drop
slightly
drops to 52 million by 2050 compared to 60 million in 1950.
However
,
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population
of 65+
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people
a steady
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rise
between 1950 and 2020 and
is predicted
to grow
considerably
by 2050.

A major problem that arises from
Possible spelling mistake. 'ageing' is British English.
ageing
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population
is funding welfare
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system
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(pension
and
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health
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care)
.
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Government
will need to allocate more
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pension
if retired
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people
continue to
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rise
.
Likewise
, more
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aged
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people
place pressure on
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health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
care
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system
as a consequence it implies burden on
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working
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age
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group
. As long as,
Possible spelling mistake. 'ageing' is British English.
ageing
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population
increases
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working
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group
will pay higher taxes that state will assign for
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health
expenditure and public
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pensions
. This will
further
strain
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government
to expand funds on other sectors. In short,
significantly
higher
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aged
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population
and shrinking
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working
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group
leads to
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pension
and
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health
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care
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system
crisis.

Possible spelling mistake. 'Ageing' is British English.
Ageing
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population
impose detrimental impact on
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economic
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growth
primarily
by
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age
related inflation. If a specific
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
consumes more services and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
than its produces, this results in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
related inflation. This occurs
mostly
in countries with a high percentage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
aged
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people
or prisoners. The state
therefore
face price increasing effect.
In contrast
, price of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduces
provided that production is more than its consumption.
Thus
,
Possible spelling mistake. 'ageing' is British English.
ageing
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population
dampens
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economic
growth.

Another
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negative
impact associated with
Possible spelling mistake. 'ageing' is British English.
ageing
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population
is decline of
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labor
force. A surge of older
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people
leads to shortage of
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working
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age
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group
which
ultimately
influence
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growth
of
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business
. Worker supply is
directly
related to demand, if supply is less it would be difficult for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
to fill demand.
Moreover
, if demand is not fulfilled it will
adversely
affect productivity, hampers
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business
expansion, higher
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labor
cost and
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reduces
competitiveness at international level. In nutshell,
Possible spelling mistake. 'ageing' is British English.
ageing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
hinders
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
business
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
growth
by declining
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
labor
force.
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IELTS academic Describe population trends in Japan. Use the data from the graph as evidence to support your claims. Suggest the potential impact on the country if the 2050 projections are correct.

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
446 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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