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Comparison between old map and new map of Colwik Arts Center

Comparison between old map and new map of Colwik Arts Center ewM6G
The maps indicates changes in the Colwik Arts Center between 2005 and today. It is clear that during this period time the Colwik Arts Center is expanded and some new buildings are added or demolished. In the 2005, the campus have 2 galleries, whereas authorities regarded 1 gallery for the Colwik Arts Center. They also divided the meeting room into the 2 meeting rooms and have displaced them in the upper-left hand the campus. On the other hand, a central exhibition area was constructed in the middle of the complex, the opposit the information desk. Furthermore, the planted trees in the wasteland and put a stage inside it. In the old map there was a snack bar in the top left-side of the Colwik Arts Center that was devastated and a new cafe, cinema, and drama studio were created. In conclusion, this comparison demonstrates that Colwik Arts center in this period is developed unprecedentedly.
The maps
You should probably use "indicate".
indicates
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in the
Possible spelling mistake found.
Colwik
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Arts
Center between 2005 and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
. It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that during this period time the
Possible spelling mistake found.
Colwik
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Arts
Center
is expanded
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
new buildings are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
added
or demolished. In the 2005, the campus have 2 galleries, whereas authorities regarded 1 gallery for the
Possible spelling mistake found.
Colwik
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Arts
Center. They
also
divided the meeting room into the 2 meeting rooms and have displaced them in the upper-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
hand the campus.
On the other hand
, a central exhibition area
was constructed
in the middle of the complex, the
Possible spelling mistake found.
opposit
the information desk.
Furthermore
, the planted trees in the wasteland and put a stage inside it. In the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
map there was a snack bar in the top
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
-side of the
Possible spelling mistake found.
Colwik
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Arts
Center that
was devastated
and a new
'cafe' is an imported foreign expression, which originally has a diacritic. Consider using "café"
cafe
, cinema, and drama studio
were created
.
In conclusion
, this comparison demonstrates that
Possible spelling mistake found.
Colwik
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Arts
center in this period
is developed
unprecedentedly
.
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IELTS academic Comparison between old map and new map of Colwik Arts Center

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
154 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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