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chart onnumber of peoplevisited the hotels in last week in delhi

chart onnumber of peoplevisited the hotels in last week in delhi A39d1
This line graph gives the information about the number of people who visited three different hotels such as Palace hotel, Taja hotel and Hotel Queen last week in delhi. We can see from the chart that most people visited the hotel on sunday in delhi. On Monday highest number of visitors at Palace hotel which was about 300. And on sunday number of visitors almost doubled which was about 650. Moreover, lowest number of people in Taja hotel were 200 which is on Wednesday and on Sunday there were about 450 customers. And for Hotel Queen we can say that there were not that much customers compare to other two hotels. there was 150-300 customers vsited in last week. In conclusion, we can say that hotels were more busier on weekends compare to weekdays in last week in Delhi.
This line graph gives the information about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who visited three
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hotels
such as Palace
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hotel
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
Taja
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hotel
and
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Hotel
Queen last week in
Possible spelling mistake found.
delhi
. We can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
from the chart that most
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
visited the
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hotel
on
Possible spelling mistake found.
sunday
in
Possible spelling mistake found.
delhi
.

On Monday highest
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number
of visitors at Palace
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hotel
which was about 300. And on
Possible spelling mistake found.
sunday
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of visitors almost doubled which was about 650.

Moreover
,
A determiner is probably missing here: "the lowest".
lowest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in
Possible spelling mistake found.
Taja
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hotel
were 200 which is on Wednesday and on Sunday there were about 450 customers.

And for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Hotel
Queen we can say that there were not that
Use "many" with countable nouns.
much
customers compare to other two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hotels
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
there
was 150-300 customers
Possible spelling mistake found.
vsited
in last week.

In conclusion
, we can say that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hotels
were
Use only "busier" (without 'more') when you use the comparative.
more busier
on weekends compare to weekdays in last week in Delhi.
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IELTS academic chart onnumber of peoplevisited the hotels in last week in delhi

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
139 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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