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British people who donate money to charity of different age groups for years 1990 and 2010

British people who donate money to charity of different age groups for years 1990 and 2010 m9WyO
The given graph illustrates the proportion of British people who donate money to charity of different age groups. The graph represents data from the years 1990 and 2010. It is clear that there is a reduction in the percentage of younger adults who donated to charities between the given two years. In contrast, more donations are observed from elders in 2010 as compared to 1990. The highest contribution can be seen from the age-group of 36-50, where almost 43% of them donated money for good causes in 1990. However, this number dropped to about 35% in the year 2010. The lowest contribution came from the age-group of 18-25 with 16% in 1990 which shrunk down to only about 6% in 2010. It is also worth noting that, although the contribution declined across the two years for the age group of upto 50, there is a slight rise visible for the age group of 50 to 65+. While the highest contribution in 1990 was from the age group of 36-50, the age group of 51-65 contributed the most in the year 2010.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
graph illustrates the proportion of British
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who donate money to charity of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
groups
. The graph represents data from the years 1990 and 2010.

It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that there is a reduction in the percentage of younger adults who donated to charities between the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
two years.
In contrast
, more donations
are observed
from elders in 2010 as compared to 1990. The highest
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contribution
can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
from the age-group of 36-50, where almost 43% of them donated money for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
causes in 1990.
However
, this number dropped to about 35% in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
2010. The lowest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
contribution
came from the age-group of 18-25 with 16% in 1990 which shrunk down to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
about 6% in 2010.

It is
also
worth noting that, although the
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contribution
declined across the two years for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
of
Possible spelling mistake found.
upto
50, there is a slight rise visible for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
of 50 to 65+. While the highest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
contribution
in 1990 was from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
of 36-50, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
of 51-65 contributed the most in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
2010.
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IELTS academic British people who donate money to charity of different age groups for years 1990 and 2010

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
181 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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