Search
Vocabularying
Listening
Reading
1. Academic
2. General
Writing
1. IELTSWriting Checker
2. IELTS Writing Samples
Speaking
1. Latest Topics
2. Speaking Club

Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.

Gaining work experience prior to graduation helps university students to succeed in getting their first job.

Gaining work experience prior to graduation helps university students to succeed in getting their first job. aJqgX

There is much evidence which shows that having experience before graduation has an impressive impact on the future job. Due to that, students in universities have to attend a work experience program. The requirements of this program are explained step by step by the diagram. First of all, it is good to be mentioned that, this program has reward credits at the end. The first stage is Application which students have to choose the workplace¬ they are interested in from the approved list and arrange an interview. The second stage is Approval. For approval. they have to send their acceptance letter to the professor after it has been received. Furthermore, we have a Schedule stage which applicants have to arrange the time which they would devote to work weekly for 20 weeks. This time should be over 10 hours per week. In the following, when all the previous stages have been done, a report form has to be submitted to the professor weekly. After this stage credits will be awarded. In the Evaluation stage, the last but not least, applicants should participate in an evaluation meeting with the work supervisor who submits the Evaluation form, during the final week.

There is much evidence which This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :demonstratesportraysindicatesdisplays
shows
 that having experience This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:previouslyprior to
before
 graduation has an impressive impact on the future job. Due to that, students in universities This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:ought to
have to
 attend a work experience program. The requirements of this program are This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :interpreted
explained
 step by step by the diagram.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".First
First of all
, it is This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :beneficialproduct
good
 to be mentioned
 that, this program has reward credits at the This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :expiration
end
. The first
You use this word too often, consider replacing it withstandinglegpointstepmomentphase
stage
 is Application which students This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:ought to
have to
 choose the Possible spelling mistake found.workplaceworkplaces
workplace¬
 they are interested
 in from the approved list and arrange an interview. The second You use this word too often, consider replacing it withstandinglegpointstepmomentphase
stage
 is Approval. For approval. This sentence does not start with an uppercase letterThey
they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:ought to
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :transmit
send
 their acceptance letter to the professor after it has been received
. Furthermore
, we have a Schedule You use this word too often, consider replacing it withstandinglegpointstepmomentphase
stage
 which applicants This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:ought to
have to
 arrange the time which they would devote to work weekly for 20 weeks. This time should be over 10 hours per week.

In the following, when all the previous You use this word too often, consider replacing it withstandinglegpointstepmomentphase
stages
 have been done
, a report form This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:oughts to
has to
be submitted
 to the professor weekly. “After” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
After
 this You use this word too often, consider replacing it withstandinglegpointstepmomentphase
stage
 credits will be awarded
. In the Evaluation You use this word too often, consider replacing it withstandinglegpointstepmomentphase
stage
, the last This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:on the contrary
but
 not least, applicants should participate in an evaluation meeting with the work supervisor who submits the Evaluation form, during the final week. 