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Below is a map of the city of Brandfield. City planners have decided to build a new shopping mall for the area, and two sites, S1 and S2 have been proposed. v.2

Below is a map of the city of Brandfield. City planners have decided to build a new shopping mall for the area, and two sites, S1 and S2 have been proposed. v. 2
The map illustrates plans for two possible sites for a shopping mall in the city of Brandfield. It can be seen that the two sites under consideration are in the north and the south east of the town. The first possible site for the shopping mall, S1, is just north of the city centre, above the railway line, which runs from the south east of the city to the north west. If it is built here, it will be next to a large housing estate, thus providing easy access for those living on the estate and in the city centre. It will also be next to the river, which runs through the town. The site in the south east, S2, is again just by the railway line and fairly close to the city centre, but it is near to an industrial estate rather than housing. There is a main road that runs through the city and is close to both sites, thus providing good road access to either location. A large golf course and park in the west of the town prevents this area from being available as a site.
The map illustrates plans for two possible
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sites
for a shopping mall in the city of
Possible spelling mistake found.
Brandfield
. It can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that the two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sites
under consideration are in the north and the
This expression is normally spelled as one or with hyphen.
south east
of the town.

The
first
possible
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site
for the shopping mall, S1, is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
north of the city
Possible spelling mistake. 'centre' is British English.
centre
, above the railway line, which runs from the
This expression is normally spelled as one or with hyphen.
south east
of the city to the
This expression is normally spelled as one or with hyphen.
north west
. If it
is built
here, it will be
next
to a large housing estate,
thus
providing easy access for those living on the estate and in the city
Possible spelling mistake. 'centre' is British English.
centre
. It will
also
be
next
to the river, which runs through the town.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
site
in the
This expression is normally spelled as one or with hyphen.
south east
, S2, is again
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
by the railway line and
fairly
close to the city
Possible spelling mistake. 'centre' is British English.
centre
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it is near to an industrial estate
rather
than housing.

There is a main road that runs through the city and is close to both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sites
,
thus
providing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
road access to either location. A large golf course and park in the west of the town
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevents
this area from being available as a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
site
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
6Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes
If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his own language, that goes to his heart.
Nelson Mandela

IELTS academic Below is a map of the city of Brandfield. City planners have decided to build a new shopping mall for the area, and two sites, S1 and S2 have been proposed. v. 2

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
190 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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