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Attendance at performing arts events in Canada by age group

Attendance at performing arts events in Canada by age group EwPgM
The given chart compares that the attendance of Canadians of different ages at live art performances. There is clearly a strong relationship between age and the sort of events people attend. The figures show that almost half of teenagers in Canada frequently go to live arts events and that they are nearly twice as likely to attend such performances as Canadians who are 60 or over. Not surprisingly, the greatest difference in attendance is for pop concerts. The 15 to 19 age group is almost five times as likely as the over 60s to attend such concerts. Likewise, the proportion of Canadians who go to Theatre, Opera and Dance performances falls as age increases. The contrast, the percentage who go to classical and choral music performances rises as age increases. Approximately 1 in 10 Canadians who are 60 or over go to classical concerts. This percentage is higher than that for teenagers. Attendance rates vary the least for Theatre and Opera performances. Only about a fifth of all age groups attends the theatre frequently. Similarly, a very small percentage of any age group go to the Opera regularly. In summary, audiences at Canadian performing arts events seems to be mainly young people attending plays or pop concerts.
The
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given
chart compares that the attendance of Canadians of
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different
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ages
at
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live
art
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performances
. There is
clearly
a strong relationship between
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age
and the sort of
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events
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
attend.

The figures
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show
that almost half of
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teenagers
in Canada
frequently
go to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
arts
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
and that they are
nearly
twice as likely to attend such
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performances
as Canadians
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who
are 60 or over. Not
surprisingly
, the greatest difference in attendance is for pop concerts. The 15 to 19
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
group is almost five times as likely as the over 60s to attend such concerts.
Likewise
, the proportion of Canadians
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who
go to
Possible spelling mistake. 'Theatre' is British English.
Theatre
, Opera and Dance
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performances
falls as
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age
increases. The contrast, the percentage
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who
go to classical and choral music
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performances
rises as
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age
increases.

Approximately 1 in 10 Canadians
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who
are 60 or over go to classical concerts.

This percentage is higher than that for
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teenagers
. Attendance rates vary the least for
Possible spelling mistake. 'Theatre' is British English.
Theatre
and Opera
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performances
.
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Only
about a fifth of all
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age
groups attends the
Possible spelling mistake. 'theatre' is British English.
theatre
frequently
.
Similarly
, a
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very
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small
percentage of any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
age
group go to the Opera
regularly
.

In summary, audiences at Canadian performing arts
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events
seems to be
mainly
young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
attending plays or pop concerts.
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IELTS academic Attendance at performing arts events in Canada by age group

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
207 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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