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as it illustarted by the graph,the veriety prorportion of social networking sites used by people who lived in Canada in 2014 and 2015.

as it illustarted by the graph, the veriety prorportion of social networking sites used by people who lived in Canada in 2014 and 2015. Wgjqk
as it illustarted by the graph, the veriety prorportion of social networking sites used by people who lived in Canada in 2014 and 2015. overall, in both 2014 and 2015 Canadian citizens prefer to use only one site, whereas the percentage of who used th efive sites was around zero. As per bar chart, it is clear that, in 2014 the rate of two sites, one sites and no site users was 23%, 36% and 22%, respectively. It had only a slight rose in two sites rate. In apposit the prorportion of site purchasers fell to under 30%(28%). By contrast, the other remaing groups experienced under 20% in this case. using three sites in social networking was not common in Canada. People wants to use one site to do their work and it followed by four and five sites. but all three data were rose in comparison with the prior year.
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as
it
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illustarted
by the graph, the
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veriety
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prorportion
of social networking
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sites
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lived
in Canada in 2014 and 2015.

This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
overall
, in both 2014 and 2015 Canadian citizens prefer to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
one
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site
, whereas the percentage of who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
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th efive
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sites
was around zero.

As per bar chart, it is
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clear
that, in 2014 the rate of two
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sites
, one
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sites
and no
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site
users was 23%, 36% and 22%,
respectively
. It had
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only
a slight rose in two
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sites
rate. In
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apposit
the
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prorportion
of
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site
purchasers fell to under 30%(28%).

By contrast, the other
Possible spelling mistake found.
remaing
groups experienced under 20%
in this case
.
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using
three
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sites
in social networking was not common in Canada.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
wants
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
one
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site
to do their work and it followed by four and five
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sites
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
but
all three data were rose
in comparison
with the prior year.
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IELTS academic as it illustarted by the graph, the veriety prorportion of social networking sites used by people who lived in Canada in 2014 and 2015.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
151 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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