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A survey to find the most popular destinations for a honeymoon

A survey to find the most popular destinations for a honeymoon 0wKrq
The given chart is the result of a recently conducted survey. With the aim to find out the most popular destination among 5000 honeymooners. Out of the 8 places, Thailand comes on top with 1, 410 couples choosing this, just ahead of the runner-up Bali, with 1, 335 couples. Costa Rica comes in third at 750 although its numbers only equivalent to half of Thailand's and Bali's. Moving on to the fourth spot is The Maldives at 600, which nearly triples the figures of Paris. Spain in the 7th position only has one-tenth of Thailand's total votes while The Greek Island quadruples the bottom position Lake District at 432 couples.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
chart is the result of a recently conducted survey. With the aim to find out the most popular destination among 5000 honeymooners.

Out of the 8 places, Thailand
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
on top with 1, 410 couples choosing this,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
ahead of the runner-up Bali, with 1, 335 couples. Costa Rica
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
in third at 750 although its numbers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
equivalent to half of Thailand's and Bali's. Moving on to the fourth spot is The Maldives at 600, which
nearly
triples the figures of Paris. Spain in the 7th position
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
has one-tenth of Thailand's total votes while The Greek Island quadruples the bottom position Lake District at 432 couples.
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IELTS academic A survey to find the most popular destinations for a honeymoon

Academic
  American English
2 paragraphs
110 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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