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You would like to participate in a work-related seminar in another country. Write a letter to the person in charge of the seminar and ask for detailed information regarding the dates, program, accommodation and cost.

You would like to participate in a work-related seminar in another country. Write a letter to the person in charge of the seminar and ask for detailed information regarding the dates, program, accommodation and cost. BXra
Hello Sir, My name is Dev Parmar I am working in marketing deparment in Sigma corporation. I heard that our company planing seminar in Canada regarding marketing techniques. I would like to particiapte in that program. First of all I would like more information about seminar. which date this seminar is? if this is in next week it wold be great for me. Secondly what is the itenary of this seminar also where it going to orgonize. I am sure it in indoor area I heard that Canada have coolest weather as compare to other countrys. Last but not least what is the arregment for the accomodation for participant and how much it would be per person. I wonder if I can stay at my uncle's place during this seminar it will be great for me. Also I like to learn and expore other companys marketing technique and apply on our products. This is a biggest oppurtinity at my job. Your truely, Dev Parmar
Hello Sir,

My name is Dev
Possible spelling mistake found.
Parmar
I am working in marketing
Possible spelling mistake found.
deparment
in Sigma corporation. I heard that our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
planing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
seminar
in Canada regarding marketing techniques. I would like to
Possible spelling mistake found.
particiapte
in that program.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
I would like more information about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
seminar
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
which
date this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
seminar
is?
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
if
this is in
next
week
Did you mean "it would"?
it wold
be great for me.
Secondly
what is the
Possible spelling mistake found.
itenary
of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
seminar
also
where
Did you mean "it's going", "it is going", or "it was going"?
it going
to
Possible spelling mistake found.
orgonize
. I am sure it in indoor area I heard that Canada have
A determiner is probably missing here: "the coolest".
coolest
weather as compare to other
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "countries", the plural form of the noun 'country'?
countrys
.

Last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not least what is the
Possible spelling mistake found.
arregment
for the
Possible spelling mistake found.
accomodation
for participant and how much it would be per person. I wonder if I can stay at my uncle's place during this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
seminar
it will be great for me.

Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Also
I like to learn and
Possible spelling mistake found.
expore
other
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "companies", the plural form of the noun 'company'?
companys
marketing technique and apply on our products. This is
Use "the" with the superlative.
a
biggest
Possible spelling mistake found.
oppurtinity
at my job.

Your
Possible spelling mistake found.
truely
,

Dev
Possible spelling mistake found.
Parmar

IELTS letter You would like to participate in a work-related seminar in another country. Write a letter to the person in charge of the seminar and ask for detailed information regarding the dates, program, accommodation and cost.

Letter
  American English
7 paragraphs
163 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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