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You recently bought a computer from a reputable computer store. The store agreed to deliver the computer and set it up for you on your home but when it was delivered,the delivery man claimed that this was not part of his job.

You recently bought a computer from a reputable computer store. The store agreed to deliver the computer and set it up for you on your home but when it was delivered, the delivery man claimed that this was not part of his job. a7rAd
Dear Mr ParkerI am writing to express my disgust with the service provided by your store. The store promised to set up my new computer at home for me but this has not occured and you have not fulfilled your contract. On 27th November I purchased an "Acer" personal computer from your city store. The price of $3, 500 included delivery and set up in my home and attack a copy of the receipt. However when it was delivered yesterday the delivery man was quite unaware of the agreement and left without setting up the computer for me. To make matters worse, your clerk treated me impolite and rude. Also, he asked me for some money for delivery. It is out of contract that I could not stand with it. I will not buy anything from your store again, however as manager you would be wise to guard against such appalling delivery of your customers in future. Yours sincerely Anna Kim
Dear Mr
Possible spelling mistake found.
ParkerI
Did you mean "am I"?
am
writing to express my disgust with the service provided by your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
store
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
store
promised to set up my new computer at home for me
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
this has not
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "occurred", the past tense form of the verb 'occur'?
occured
and you have not fulfilled your contract. On 27th November I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchased
an
Use a smart opening quote here: "“".
"
Acer
Use a smart closing quote here: "”".
"
personal computer from your city
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
store
. The price of $3, 500 included
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
delivery
and set up in my home and attack a copy of the receipt.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
when it
was delivered
yesterday the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
delivery
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
was quite unaware of the agreement and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
without setting up the computer for me. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
matters worse, your clerk treated me impolite and rude.
Also
, he asked me for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
money for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
delivery
. It is out of contract that I could not stand with it. I will not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
anything from your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
store
again,
however
as manager you would be wise to guard against such appalling
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
delivery
of your customers
Did you mean: "in the future"?
in future
. Yours
sincerely
Anna
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
Kim
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IELTS letter You recently bought a computer from a reputable computer store. The store agreed to deliver the computer and set it up for you on your home but when it was delivered, the delivery man claimed that this was not part of his job.

Letter
  American English
1 paragraphs
160 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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