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You live in a room in college which you share with another student. However, there are many problems with this arrangement and you find it very difficult to work. Write a letter to the accommodation officer at the college. In the letter, • describe the situation • explain your problems and why it is difficult to work • say what kind of accommodation you would prefer

You live in a room in college which you share with another student. However, there are many problems with this arrangement and you find it very difficult to work. Write a letter to the accommodation officer at the college. In the letter, • describe the situation • explain your problems and why it is difficult to work • say what kind of accommodation you would prefer n792
Dear Sir, My name is Jim, third year student at your esteemed college and I am writing this letter to bring it your attention that I find extremely difficult to concentrate on my studies in the dorm assigned to me. The dorm itself is not only open, refreshing and airy but it is also pretty pleasant to study and work on my project work. However, I have been facing issues with my new roommate. He has made total nuisance in our space. My previous roommate recently left to another college and the accommodation is assigned to a new student. He is extremely outgoing and outspoken person, who likes to party and play music all night. As a result of that, I am not able to sleep well at night and not able to study in class. My whole routine has turned upside down because of his habits. I would like you to consider allocating me a similar dorm with someone who is sensible and humble towards others. It would be absolutely beneficial to improve my concentration and academic records. I hope to hear back from you soon. Yours sincerely, Jim
Dear Sir,

My name is Jim, third year student at your esteemed
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
college and
I am writing this letter to bring it your attention that I find
extremely
difficult to concentrate on my studies in the dorm assigned to me.

The dorm itself is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
open, refreshing and airy
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it is
also
pretty pleasant to study and work on my project work.
However
, I have been facing issues with my new roommate. He has made total nuisance in our space.

My previous roommate recently
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
to another college and the accommodation
is assigned
to a new student. He is
extremely
outgoing and outspoken person, who likes to party and play music all night.
As a result
of that, I am not able to sleep well at night and not able to study in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
. My whole routine has turned upside down
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of his habits.

I would like you to consider allocating me a similar dorm with someone who is sensible and humble towards others. It would be
absolutely
beneficial to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
my concentration and academic records.

I hope to hear back from you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
.

Yours
sincerely
,

Jim

IELTS letter You live in a room in college which you share with another student. However, there are many problems with this arrangement and you find it very difficult to work. Write a letter to the accommodation officer at the college. In the letter, • describe the situation • explain your problems and why it is difficult to work • say what kind of accommodation you would prefer

Letter
  American English
8 paragraphs
189 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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  • Meet the criteria
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  • You live in a room in college which you share with another student. However, there are many problems with this arrangement and you find it very difficult to work. Write a letter to the accommodation officer at the college. In the letter, • describe the situation • explain your problems and why it is difficult to work • say what kind of accommodation you would prefer