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you have seen an advertisement for a weekend job as a local tour guide showing visitors around the city. write a letter of application to the tourism office

you have seen an advertisement for a weekend job as a local tour guide showing visitors around the city. write a letter of application to the tourism office YL2XN
Dear Madam, I am writing to express my interest in the local tour guide job. I got so excited when a former co-worker showed me the advertisement. I have worked in a travel agency for 2 years and have good experience. Besides that, I am eager to learn and I am super passionate for this job. I have also worked as a hotel tour guide for a short period of time. I will be graduating in world history from NYCU in august therefor I think I’m a good fit for this job and I believe it is a fantastic opportunity for me to show my knowledge on history, historical places and tourist attractions. I would love to hear from you. You can reach me by this address. Sincerely, Sarah Johnson
Dear Madam,

I am writing to express my interest in the local tour guide job. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
excited when a former co-worker
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
me the advertisement.

Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
have worked in a travel agency for 2 years and have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
experience.
Besides
that, I am eager to
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
learn and
I am super passionate for this job. I have
also
worked as a hotel tour guide for a short period of time. I will be graduating in world history from
Possible spelling mistake found.
NYCU
in
The month "August" needs to be capitalized.
august
therefor I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
I’m a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
fit for this job and I believe it is a fantastic opportunity for me to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
my knowledge on history, historical places and tourist attractions.

Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
to hear from you. You can reach me by this address.

Sincerely
,

Sarah Johnson

IELTS letter you have seen an advertisement for a weekend job as a local tour guide showing visitors around the city. write a letter of application to the tourism office

Letter
  American English
6 paragraphs
129 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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