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You have been invited to attend an interview for a place studying a course at a college. Unfortunately, because of a previous appointment, you cannot come at the time they wish. v.2

You have been invited to attend an interview for a place studying a course at a college. Unfortunately, because of a previous appointment, you cannot come at the time they wish. v. 2
Dear Sir or Madam, I have received your invitation for an interview on 14th May at 11. 00 in the morning to finalise my admission to the MBA programme at your college and I profoundly thank you for that. Unfortunately, I cannot come at the specified time because of another commitment. I am hoping that you would allow me to meet you on a different date. I am working with a multinational company for the last three years and they have scheduled a seminar on the same day at 10. 30 am. The company has designated me to attend the seminar and I can not skip it. It will start in the morning and continue till 4. 00 pm in the afternoon. This makes it impossible for me to meet you in the interview at the scheduled time. Please accept my apology for not being able to attend the interview as planned. However, I can meet you any other day whichever is convenient for you. Meanwhile, I would appreciate if you could tell the duration of the interview. Also, will it be an oral interview only or do I have to take a test as well? Once again my sincere apology for not attending the interview at the scheduled time. I look looking forward to hearing from you soon. Yours faithfully, Mansoor Afzal
Dear Sir or Madam,

I have received your invitation for an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interview
on 14th May at 11. 00 in the morning to
Possible spelling mistake. 'finalise' is British English.
finalise
my admission to the MBA
Possible spelling mistake. 'programme' is British English.
programme
at your college and I
profoundly
thank you for that. Unfortunately, I cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
at the specified time
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of another commitment. I am hoping that you would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
me to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
you on a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
date.

I am working with a multinational
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
for the last three
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
years and
they have scheduled a seminar on the same day at 10. 30 am. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
has designated me to attend the seminar and I can not skip it. It will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
in the morning and continue till 4. 00
This is redundant. Consider using "pm".
pm in the afternoon
. This
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
it impossible for me to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
you in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interview
at the scheduled time.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Please
accept my apology for not being able to attend the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interview
as planned.
However
, I can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
you any other day whichever is convenient for you. Meanwhile, I would appreciate if you could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
the duration of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interview
.
Also
, will it be an oral
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interview
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
or do I
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
take a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
test
as well
?

Once again my sincere apology for not attending the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
interview
at the scheduled time.

I look looking forward to hearing from you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
.

Yours
faithfully
,

Possible spelling mistake found.
Mansoor
Possible spelling mistake found.
Afzal
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
6Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes
You can never understand one language until you understand at least two.
Geoffrey Willans

IELTS letter You have been invited to attend an interview for a place studying a course at a college. Unfortunately, because of a previous appointment, you cannot come at the time they wish. v. 2

Letter
  American English
8 paragraphs
222 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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