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You have a full-time job and are also doing a part-time evening course. You now find that you cannot continue the course. v.5

You have a full-time job and are also doing a part-time evening course. You now find that you cannot continue the course. v. 5
Dear Mrs Rachel, Hope you are doing well. I am Raul Mitra, one of the students who are taking a part-time Oracle Database course with you. Anyway, the reason I am writing this letter to inform you that I won’t be able to continue this part-time course, which I really enjoy with you, for a couple of reasons. The first reason is that I have been handed a few additional responsibilities at my full-time job which means that I would need to spend extra time at my office. And, if I spend additional time at my office, it is highly unlikely that I will be able to arrive in your class on time. The second reason, of course, is that after finishing my office work, when I actually arrive in your classroom, I feel a bit too tired because of spending too much time on the road due to the bad traffic situation. Therefore, based on my situation above, I would really appreciate it if you could allow me to take the course at another time when it is convenient for me, possibly from the June session. I would really appreciate your help regarding this. Yours faithfully, Raul Mitra
Dear Mrs Rachel,

Hope you are doing well. I am Raul
Possible spelling mistake found.
Mitra
, one of the students who are taking a part-time Oracle Database
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
course
with you. Anyway, the reason I am writing this letter to inform you that I won’t be able to continue this part-time
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
course
, which I
really
enjoy with you, for a couple of reasons.

The
first
reason is that I have
been handed
a few additional responsibilities at my full-time job which means that I would need to spend extra
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
at my office. And, if I spend additional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
at my office, it is
highly
unlikely that I will be able to arrive in your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
. The second reason, of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
course
, is that after finishing my office work, when I actually arrive in your classroom, I feel a bit too tired
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of spending too much
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on the road due to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
traffic situation.

Therefore
, based on my situation above, I would
really
appreciate it if you could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
me to take the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
course
at another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
when it is convenient for me,
possibly
from the June session.

I would
really
appreciate your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
regarding this.

Yours
faithfully
,

Raul
Possible spelling mistake found.
Mitra
4Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
9Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS letter You have a full-time job and are also doing a part-time evening course. You now find that you cannot continue the course. v. 5

Letter
  American English
7 paragraphs
198 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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