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You have a friend who lives in a city abroad. You have decided that you would like to apply to do a course at one of the colleges in this city. v.4

You have a friend who lives in a city abroad. You have decided that you would like to apply to do a course at one of the colleges in this city. v. 4
Dear Robert, It seems like ages since we last met and time indeed flies. I am very sorry that I had not been in touch with you as frequently as I should have in the last few months. I had been terribly busy and could scarcely manage time for myself or for my family. I hope Samantha and Anna are doing great. I have decided to enrol in a professional graphics designing course in Melbourne, Australia and I went through websites of different colleges in Melbourne. You are the best person I know to advise me on this. I prefer a college from your city because my uncle lives there with his family and being in the same city where you live in would be an advantage for me. For the last three years, I have been working as a tech support member for a large IT company and as you know Math was my major in our school. I am quite confused about which college I should apply to and this is why I am turning to you for the advice. I would really appreciate your help regarding this. Also, can you find out what additional qualifications like an English language test score and so on are required to get admitted to such a college? I hope you would not mind doing this for me and I would proceed according to your advice. Take care and write me back when it is convenient for you. Best regards, Anthony
Dear Robert,

It seems like ages since we last met and time
indeed
flies. I am
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
sorry that I had not been in touch with you as
frequently
as I should have in the last few months. I had been
terribly
busy and could
scarcely
manage time for myself or for my family.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
hope Samantha and Anna are doing great.

Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
have decided to enrol in a professional graphics designing course in Melbourne, Australia and I went through websites of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
colleges in Melbourne. You are the best person I know to advise me on this. I prefer a college from your city
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
my uncle
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
there with his family and being in the same city where you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in would be an advantage for me.

For the last three years, I have been working as a tech support member for a large IT
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
and as you know Math was my major in our school. I am quite confused about which college I should apply to and this is why I am turning to you for the advice. I would
really
appreciate your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
regarding this.
Also
, can you find out what additional qualifications like an English language
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
test
score and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on
are required
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
admitted to such a college?

I hope you would not mind doing this for me and I would proceed according to your advice.

Take care and write me back when it is convenient for you.

Best regards,

Anthony
2Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
Learning is a treasure that will follow its owner everywhere.
Chinese Proverb

IELTS letter You have a friend who lives in a city abroad. You have decided that you would like to apply to do a course at one of the colleges in this city. v. 4

Letter
  American English
8 paragraphs
248 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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