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You borrowed a book from a public library and the book is now damaged. v.1

You borrowed a book from a public library and the book is now damaged. v. 1
Dear Sir or Madam, Two weeks ago I borrowed a book from your library. I was excited to have read the book but very disappointed to recently find that it was damaged. I am hoping you will allow me to purchase a new book of the same title as compensation. In relation to the specifics of the book, I borrowed 'Nineteen Eighty-Four' a novel by George Orwell, on 17th July from your library using my library card BM-450124. I have been thoroughly enjoying the book and almost finished it until it got damaged. Unfortunately, On 25th July, three days before the due date to return the novel, I found that it was ruined due to the pouring rain that somehow reached my table placed near the window. I put the book on the table and had been outside the whole time it rained. All of the books on the table absorbed rainwater and the book I borrowed from the library is now unreadable due to the damage the water caused to it. As a solution, and because I really want to express my apology for the incident, I seek your permission to purchase a new book with the same title for the library. I am also hoping that you would not impose any penalty for the incident. Thank you in advance and I hope to hear your reply soon. Yours faithfully, Erica Jong
Dear Sir or Madam,

Two weeks ago I borrowed a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
from your library. I
was excited
to have read the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
disappointed to recently find that it
was damaged
. I am hoping you will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
me to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
a new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
of the same title as compensation.

In relation to the specifics of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
, I borrowed 'Nineteen Eighty-Four' a novel by George Orwell, on 17th July from your library using my library card BM-450124. I have been
thoroughly
enjoying the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
and almost finished it until it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
damaged.

Unfortunately, On 25th July, three days
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
the due date to return the novel, I found that it
was ruined
due to the pouring rain that somehow reached my table placed near the window. I put the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
on the table and had been outside the whole time it rained.
Consider using "all the".
All of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
on the table absorbed rainwater and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
I borrowed from the library is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
unreadable due to the damage the water caused to it.

As a solution, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
I
really
want to express my apology for the incident, I seek your permission to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
a new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
with the same title for the library. I am
also
hoping that you would not impose any penalty for the incident.

Thank you in advance and I hope to hear your reply
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
.

Yours
faithfully
,

Erica
Possible spelling mistake found.
Jong
1Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
9Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS letter You borrowed a book from a public library and the book is now damaged. v. 1

Letter
  American English
8 paragraphs
232 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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