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You are part of a group of musicians who meet on Monday and Wednesday evenings to practise in the community hall. You have been told, however, that it is no longer possible for the group to use the hall. v. 1

Dear Mr Andrew, I am Alfred Ton, a member of the 'Trinity' music band, writing to express my grave concern about the letter we received from the community hall authority last Friday. I am hoping that you would allow us to continue our practice at a convent time you feel suitable for a greater good. The letter simply stated that we no longer can practise in the community hall and better look for an alternative. The scenario is, in fact, complicated than that. As a young group of musicians, we patronise the community and often perform without any royalty. We primarily focus on music and lyrics that promote the peace, protest wars and inequity in the society. A large number of followers, mostly youths, are encouraged by our work and they follow us on social media. We believe in our community and all the members of our band are sworn to work for a greater cause, not for money or fame. We often attend community welfare programmes and do voluntary social works as a team. If we are barred from using the community hall, we will soon find it hard to keep our dream alive as we are unable to hire an expensive location for practice. The purpose of the community hall is, in fact, to foster good works and support the community members, not to discourage them. I, on behalf of my team, would like you to reconsider the decision as we believe in your vision for a better society. We can use the community hall on Friday and Saturday morning when according to my knowledge, no one uses it. Thanking you in advance. Yours faithfully, Alfred Ton

IELTS letter You are part of a group of musicians who meet on Monday and Wednesday evenings to practise in the community hall. You have been told, however, that it is no longer possible for the group to use the hall. v.1

Dear Mr Andrew,

I
am Alfred
Ton, a member of the 'Trinity' music band, writing to express my grave concern about the letter we received from the
community
hall
authority last Friday. I am hoping that you would
allow
us to continue our practice at a convent time you feel suitable for a greater
good
.

The letter
simply
stated that we no longer can
practise
in the
community
hall
and better look for an alternative. The scenario is, in fact,
complicated
than that. As a young group of musicians, we
patronise
the
community
and
often
perform without any royalty. We
primarily
focus on music and lyrics that promote the peace, protest wars and inequity in the society.
A large number of
followers,
mostly
youths,
are encouraged
by our
work and
they follow us on social media. We believe in our
community
and all the members of our band
are sworn
to
work
for a greater cause, not for money or fame. We
often
attend
community
welfare
programmes
and do voluntary social works as a team.

If we
are barred
from using the
community
hall
, we will
soon
find it
hard
to
keep
our dream alive as we are unable to hire an expensive location for practice. The purpose of the
community
hall
is, in fact, to foster
good
works and support the
community
members, not to discourage them.

I, on behalf of my team, would like you to reconsider the decision as we believe in your vision for a better society. We can
use
the
community
hall
on Friday and Saturday morning when according to my knowledge, no one
uses
it.

Thanking you in advance.

Yours
faithfully
,

Alfred Ton
0Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
16Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes
You can never understand one language until you understand at least two.
Geoffrey Willans
Letter
8 paragraphs
278 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resources: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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