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write an email to the president of the club (about 120-150 words). Tell them your thoughts about the cancelled trip to the scientific centre to see the robortic device

write an email to the president of the club (about 120-150 words). Tell them your thoughts about the cancelled trip to the scientific centre to see the robortic device EdrM3
Dear SerI am a new member of the club of technological devices and decided to write to inform you about cancelled visiting our group to the scientific cenrtre to learn more about the robortic device accordingly to the letter from the president of the centre because of shortage number of our attendance. In this case I want to offer you some supportive ideas to develop the relationship between the science centre asking your allowance to organize a ceminar in our club about the new technology devices in morden life making our club presentation for the intraduction our future plan to improve the creativity and knowledge which includes each member presentations and decided to invite the president of the centre to the event. I think my trying will help us for the future relationship with other important for our club people. With best regardsa monitor of technology clubJohn Dereck
Dear
Possible spelling mistake found.
SerI
am a new member of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
club
of technological devices and decided to write to inform you about cancelled visiting our group to the scientific
Possible spelling mistake found.
cenrtre
to learn more about the
Possible spelling mistake found.
robortic
device
accordingly
to the letter from the president of the
Possible spelling mistake. 'centre' is British English.
centre
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of shortage number of our attendance.
In this case
I want to offer you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
supportive
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
to develop the relationship between the science
Possible spelling mistake. 'centre' is British English.
centre
asking your allowance to organize a
Possible spelling mistake found.
ceminar
in our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
club
about the new technology devices in
Possible spelling mistake found.
morden
life making our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
club
presentation for the
Possible spelling mistake found.
intraduction
our future plan to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the creativity and knowledge which includes each member presentations and decided to invite the president of the
Possible spelling mistake. 'centre' is British English.
centre
to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
event
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
my trying will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us for the future relationship with other
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
club
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
. With best
Possible spelling mistake found.
regardsa
monitor of technology
Possible spelling mistake found.
clubJohn
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
Dereck
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IELTS letter write an email to the president of the club (about 120-150 words). Tell them your thoughts about the cancelled trip to the scientific centre to see the robortic device

Letter
  American English
1 paragraphs
147 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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