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Write a letter to your friend telling him/ her about one of your most memorable past experiences

Write a letter to your friend telling him/ her about one of your most memorable past experiences 1kAeL
Dear Jennie, I’m very glad writing letter for you. I am going to tell you one of the most memorable past experiences. Several years ago I got involved in a voluntary project with my siblings and I understood the world around me more. It was a remote area that the villagers were very poor, kids had few clothes to wear, food to eat. We came here to give them necessities such as books, pens, clothes, money, etc. Furthermore, we celebrated a programm for children and they amazed me with their agility and intelligence. The trip contentedly came to an end. I hope in the future I will allocate more time to join in such meaningful projects. What about you? Have you ever got a great experience that you cannot forget? Best wishes, Pkha
Dear Jennie,

I’m
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
glad writing letter for you. I am going to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
you one of the most memorable
Consider using "experiences".
past experiences
. Several years ago I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
involved in a voluntary project with my siblings and I understood the world around me more. It was a remote area that the villagers were
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
poor, kids had few clothes to wear, food to eat. We came here to give them necessities such as books, pens, clothes, money, etc.
Furthermore
, we celebrated a
Possible spelling mistake found.
programm
for
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
children and
they amazed me with their agility and intelligence. The trip
contentedly
came to an
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
. I hope in the future I will allocate more time to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
in such meaningful projects.

What about you? Have you ever
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
a great experience that you cannot forget?

Best wishes,

Possible spelling mistake found.
Pkha
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IELTS letter Write a letter to your friend telling him/ her about one of your most memorable past experiences

Letter
  American English
5 paragraphs
132 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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