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Write a letter to the headmaster and ask him/her to let you join in the trip outside country with your son. You should state reasons why you should be allowed to join and information about the country

Write a letter to the headmaster and ask him/her to let you join in the trip outside country with your son. You should state reasons why you should be allowed to join and information about the country Kyw79
Dear Mr. Smith, My name is Abeer Syed – parent of Zain who studies in grade 2. I was recently informed by one of his class teacher about a three day overseas school trip to Georgia and that the head teacher looks for parents to go with their children. My son unfortunately experiences difficulties in breathing due to a by-birth condition and requires constant supervision. I will have a week-off from work and that will able me to join my son. I can look after my son and ensure his health remains stable throughout the trip. With having a background in child psychology and besides taking care of my son; I can assist the school management in making this trip a hassle-free in any regards possible. I will be grateful if travel arrangements are made to include me. Since I have never been to this country before, I would like to know more about its climate since the information will assist me in arranging proper clothings for me as well as my son. I look forward to receiving you reply. Yours Sincerely, Abeer
Dear Mr. Smith,

My name is
Possible spelling mistake found.
Abeer
Possible spelling mistake found.
Syed
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
–
parent of
Possible spelling mistake found.
Zain
who studies in grade 2. I was recently informed by one of his
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
teacher about a
When a number forms part of an adjectival compound, use a hyphen: "three-day"
three day
overseas school trip to Georgia and that the head teacher looks for parents to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
go with
their children.

My
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
son
unfortunately experiences difficulties in breathing due to a by-birth condition and requires constant supervision. I will have a week-off from work and that
Did you mean "will be able"?
will able
me to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
son
. I can look after my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
son
and ensure his health remains stable throughout the trip. With having a background in child psychology and
besides
taking care of my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
son
; I can assist the school management in making this trip a hassle-free in any regards possible. I will be grateful if travel arrangements
are made
to include me.

Since I have never been to this country
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
, I would like to know more about its climate since the information will assist me in arranging proper
Possible spelling mistake found.
clothings
for me
as well
as my son.

I look forward to receiving you reply.

Yours
Sincerely
,

Possible spelling mistake found.
Abeer
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IELTS letter Write a letter to the headmaster and ask him/her to let you join in the trip outside country with your son. You should state reasons why you should be allowed to join and information about the country

Letter
  American English
7 paragraphs
182 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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