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Write a letter to parents regarding job of governess

Write a letter to parents regarding job of governess 3b2R5
Dear Sir, I am Manish Kaushik and have seen your advertisement in an Australian magazine regarding governess of your six year old child. Here I am offering my proposition for the governess of your child. I like the job, as I love kids and also having professional qualification for governing kinder kids. I am loyal, hardworking and soft-spoken and love orientating with the kids. Thus I feel, I am the most suitable candidature for aforesaid work. You can run background check on me with my previous employer and the concerned authorities. Also, I love Australia very much specially its geographical diversity and adventure activities. I have a keen interest in travelling and adventure and would like to have fun while living in Australia in my spare time. Please consider my proposition for the governess of your child. Thanking you in anticipation! RegardsManish K Kaushik
Dear Sir, I am
Possible spelling mistake found.
Manish
Possible spelling mistake found.
Kaushik
and have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
your advertisement in an Australian magazine regarding governess of your six year
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
child. Here I am offering my proposition for the governess of your child. I like the job, as I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
kids and
also
having professional qualification for governing kinder kids. I am loyal, hardworking and soft-spoken and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
orientating with the kids.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Thus
I feel, I am the most suitable candidature for aforesaid work. You can run background
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
on me with my previous employer and the concerned authorities.
Also
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
Australia
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
much
specially
its geographical diversity and adventure activities. I have a keen interest in travelling and adventure and would like to have fun while living in Australia in my spare time.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Please
consider my proposition for the governess of your child. Thanking you in anticipation!
Possible spelling mistake found.
RegardsManish
K
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
Kaushik
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IELTS letter Write a letter to parents regarding job of governess

Letter
  American English
1 paragraphs
143 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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