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write a letter to boss on issue

Hi Vasu I want to escalate one issue with the Monsoon team regarding BEATS CMS UAT - OEL UPGRADE. DevOps team commenced the BEATS CMS UAT - OEL UPGRADE on Jan 13th, initially we started with the author(3 VMS), but we got an error in monsoon dashboard, and it automatically created CST’s. While the Monsoon team was debugging the issue, they accidentally deleted the VM’s, and they send out an email that VMS got deleted but, we tried to re-create VM’S in the same zone. However, we are getting the same error in monsoon dashboard and we again reached to monsoon team and they replied that, there is no capacity in the zone-2 Reno. Finally, we got hold of the Monsoon team on last Thursday, and they agreed upon solving the issue on Friday morning, again we are getting the error in monsoon dashboard and, it has been two weeks now, UAT is not available. App team will escalate the issue sooner, if the issue is not fixed by Monday. Can you please help to talk with APS CLOUD SUPPORT manager(jgeorge@apple. com)?
Hi
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Vasu


I want to escalate one
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issue
with the
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Monsoon
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
team
regarding BEATS CMS UAT
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
-
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OEL
UPGRADE. DevOps
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team
commenced the
An apostrophe may be missing.
BEATS
CMS UAT
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
-
Possible spelling mistake found.
OEL
UPGRADE on Jan 13th,
initially
we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
with the author(3 VMS),
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
an error in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
monsoon
dashboard, and it
automatically
created CST’s. While the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Monsoon
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
team
was debugging the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
, they
accidentally
deleted the VM’s, and they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
out an email that VMS
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
deleted
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
, we tried to re-create VM’S in the same zone.
However
, we are getting the same error in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
monsoon
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
dashboard and
we again reached to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
monsoon
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
team and
they replied that, there is no capacity in the zone-2 Reno.
Finally
, we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
hold of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Monsoon
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
team
on last Thursday, and they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agreed
upon solving the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
on Friday morning, again we are getting the error in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
monsoon
dashboard and, it has been two weeks
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
, UAT is not available.

App
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
team
will escalate the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
sooner, if the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
by Monday.

Can you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
please
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to talk with APS CLOUD SUPPORT manager(
Possible spelling mistake found.
jgeorge@apple
If this is a question, use a question mark.
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter.
com
)?
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IELTS letter write a letter to boss on issue

Letter
  American English
4 paragraphs
182 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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