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There are insufficient sport facilities in your hometown for people your age. Write a letter to the local council. In your letter – Tell them where you live – Describe the problem – Explain what you would like them to do about it

There are insufficient sport facilities in your hometown for people your age. Write a letter to the local council. In your letter – Tell them where you live – Describe the problem – Explain what you would like them to do about it Dq6r6
Dear Sir / Madam, I am writing this letter to bring your attention for the inadequate sports facilities in our community which also affecting the health of the younger generation. I am a resident of Halmstad community and living in the second street sout hall near city center. The community is very neat and clean with approximate 300 house units and very fewer park for childrens. Also the majority of people includling my self in the community are youngsters with the ages not more then 25 years old and due to this reasons most of youth requires to play around the community. Despite the well developed community we are not having sufficient sports area where the youth can play actively sports, For instance, there is no football play ground and very few places for indoor swimming also parks are not maintained for walking. Therefore, I would like to request to build football playgrounds as young generations are more keen to play local tournaments and addition to this in our community several people would like do swimming hence a swimming center could be an additional requirement. I hope will take my suggesstions into your consideration, and plan for the essential actions. Yours faithfully, John Smith.
Dear Sir / Madam,

I am writing this letter to bring your attention for the inadequate sports facilities in our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
community
which
also
affecting the health of the younger generation.

I am a resident of
Possible spelling mistake found.
Halmstad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
community
and living in the second
Possible spelling mistake found.
street sout
hall near city center. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
community
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
neat and clean with approximate 300
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
units and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
fewer park for
Possible spelling mistake found.
childrens
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Also
the majority of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
Possible spelling mistake found.
includling
my self in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
community
are youngsters with the ages not more
Comparison requires "than", not 'then' nor 'as'.
then
25 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
and due to this reasons
Consider using "most youth" or "most of the youth".
most of youth
requires to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
around the community.

Despite the
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
well developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
community
we are not having sufficient sports area where the youth can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
actively
sports,
For instance
, there is no football
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
ground and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
few places for indoor swimming
also
parks are not maintained for walking.

Therefore
, I would like to request to build football playgrounds as young generations are more keen to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
play
local tournaments and addition to this in our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
community
several
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
would like do swimming
hence
a swimming center could be an additional requirement.

I hope will take my
Possible spelling mistake found.
suggesstions
into your consideration, and plan for the essential actions.

Yours
faithfully
,

John Smith.
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IELTS letter There are insufficient sport facilities in your hometown for people your age. Write a letter to the local council. In your letter – Tell them where you live – Describe the problem – Explain what you would like them to do about it

Letter
  American English
8 paragraphs
204 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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