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Tell me something about your school

Tell me something about your school Ol3K7
Hi everybody my name is Alexander, I’m 12 years old and I’m a pupil, I’ve studied in Nhut Tao secondary school, today I would like to tell u something about my school. When I’ve got into my school, I thought it was tiny cause it’s smaller than my primary school, my friends accepted with me that’s tiny too, but I thought it wasn’t a big problem, I met many new friends, new teachers, new knowledge, …etc, I was shook cause there are many rooms I haven’t thought it’s possible to stay in a school, my secondary has many amazing rooms such as a laboratory, a library and a dinner room, I haven’t thought these were possible, oh my gosh, the laboratory has many test tube, cube, globe, many interesting things, I hope I can go to that room even once but I was in grade 6 and I haven’t learned about chemistry so I can’t, let’s turn back my school, after joined the class few day I was shook about the lessons, math, history, biology, physical, etc. . I was interested because these knowledge I haven’t learned before so I was enjoying the class while someone didn’t, that’s all what about my tiny school so thank u for spending time to read this story from me thank u
Hi everybody my name is Alexander, I’m 12 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
and I’m a pupil, I’ve studied in
Possible spelling mistake found.
Nhut
Tao secondary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
I would like to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
u something about my
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school
. When I’ve
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
into my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
, I
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thought
it was tiny cause it’s smaller than my primary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
, my friends
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
accepted
with me that’s tiny too,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
thought
it wasn’t a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
problem, I met
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
new friends, new teachers, new knowledge, …etc, I was
Consider using a past participle here: "shaken".
shook
cause there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rooms
I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
haven’t
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
thought
it’s possible to stay in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
, my secondary has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
amazing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rooms
such as a laboratory, a library and a dinner
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
room
, I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
haven’t
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
thought
these were possible, oh my gosh, the laboratory has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
test
tube, cube, globe,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
interesting things, I hope I can go to that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
room
even once
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I was in grade 6 and I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
haven’t
learned about chemistry
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
I can’t,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
’s turn back my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
, after
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
joined
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
Possible agreement error. The noun day seems to be countable; consider using: "few days".
few day
I was
Consider using a past participle here: "shaken".
shook
about the lessons, math, history, biology, physical, etc.
Two consecutive dots
.
I
was interested
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
Did you mean "this knowledge" or "these knowledges"?
these knowledge
I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
haven’t
learned
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
I was enjoying the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
while someone didn’t, that’s all what about my tiny
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
thank u for spending time to read this story from me thank
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
u
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IELTS letter Tell me something about your school

Letter
  American English
1 paragraphs
217 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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