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Tell about your last business trip

Tell about your last business trip BLmMa
Hi teacher, my name is Ngoc. Today, I’m going to tell you about my last week. I’m working for Unilever company and my position as sales rep presentative as working for sales and marketing department. I just got a contract with the partner and I went on a business trip to discuss with the partner. Today, I’m gonna tell you about my trip 3 weeks ago and the president said that the trip has signed a contract with a potential customer. The trip lasted for 2 days 1 night. I went to Nha Trang city with my co-worker and I follow a very strict schedule. In the morning, I went to the restaurant in the hotel to have breakfast and after that, in the afternoon I went to meet a customer. In the evening will sign the contract. I have a dinner with the customer to talk about the new product. After the trip I got a contract signed and I learned a lot from the way I have to do it with the customer. I came back to HCM City today later
Hi teacher, my name is
Possible spelling mistake found.
Ngoc
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Today
, I’m going to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
you about my
‘last week’ indicates a finished event of the past. Please check the predicate's tense.
last week
. I’m working for Unilever
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
and my position as sales rep
Possible spelling mistake found.
presentative
as working for sales and marketing department. I
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
contract
with the partner and I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
went
on a business
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trip
to discuss with the partner.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Today
, I’m
The word 'gonna' is informal. Consider an alternative.
gonna
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
you about my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trip
3 weeks ago and the president said that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trip
has signed a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
contract
with a potential
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customer
. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trip
lasted for 2 days 1 night. I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
went
to
Possible spelling mistake found.
Nha
Possible spelling mistake found.
Trang
city with my co-worker and I follow a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
strict schedule. In the morning, I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
went
to the restaurant in the hotel to have breakfast and after that, in the afternoon I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
went
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customer
. In the evening will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sign
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
contract
. I
When we speak of types of meals, the article is not required: "have dinner".
have a dinner
with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customer
to talk about the new product. After the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
trip
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
contract
signed and I learned a lot from the way I
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
do it with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customer
. I came back to
Possible spelling mistake found.
HCM
City
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
later
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IELTS letter Tell about your last business trip

Letter
  American English
1 paragraphs
182 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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