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Request letter for join IETS club

Request letter for join IETS club BM276
Dear Mrs Simpson I am writing to inquire about you IELTS centre. I am first year student at Economical College. I have just discovered that my college does not provide any IELTS clubs as of yet. However, I found your Diamonds IELTS to be the nearest language club and would like to request more information about it. Firstly, I wonder if you could possibly give me a small overview of the available facilities. It would be interesting to know whether the club offers some interactive services and personal training sessions. . Secondly, I would be interested to know how your level is and your pupils are. If you join me in your English course, it will be very greatful. Because, I want to know learning another international language and I am going to open my chances all over the world. I look forward to hearing from you soon. Yours sincerely, Mohinur
Dear Mrs Simpson

I am writing to inquire about
Possible mistake. Please verify.
you IELTS
Possible spelling mistake. 'centre' is British English.
centre
.

I am
first
year student at Economical College.

I have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
discovered that my college does not provide any IELTS clubs as of
yet
.
However
, I found your Diamonds IELTS to be the nearest language club and would like to request more information about it.

Firstly
, I wonder if you could
possibly
give me a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
overview of the available facilities. It would be interesting to know whether the club offers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
interactive services and personal training sessions.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.


Secondly
, I would
be interested
to know how your level is and your pupils are. If you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
me in your English course, it will be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
Possible spelling mistake found.
greatful
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
, I want to know learning another international
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
language and
I am going to open my chances all over the world.

I look forward to hearing from you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
.

Yours
sincerely
,

Possible spelling mistake found.
Mohinur

IELTS letter Request letter for join IETS club

Letter
  American English
8 paragraphs
150 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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