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My friend's parent want him to go on holiday with them this summer but he prefer to go somewhere with his friends. He has to choose. I have to give him some advice.

My friend's parent want him to go on holiday with them this summer but he prefer to go somewhere with his friends. He has to choose. I have to give him some advice. K3lb3
Dear John Hi. How is it going? I am very glad when I received your letter. I sympathize with you in this case. But I think maybe your parents know that you want to go somewhere with your friend but they still required you to go on holiday with them. They can be worried if you go somewhere which is not safe with your friends. They just want to take care of you. I hope this reason can make you rethink and after that you make a wise decision. Bye for now. I am looking forward to hearing from you again. Your friends
Dear John

Hi. How is it going? I am
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
glad when I received your letter. I sympathize with you
in this case
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
maybe your parents know that you want to go somewhere with your friend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they
still
required you to go on holiday with them. They can
be worried
if you go somewhere which is not safe with your friends. They
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
want to take care of you. I hope this reason can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
you rethink and after that you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a wise decision. Bye for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
. I am looking forward to hearing from you again.

Your friends
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IELTS letter My friend's parent want him to go on holiday with them this summer but he prefer to go somewhere with his friends. He has to choose. I have to give him some advice.

Letter
  American English
2 paragraphs
102 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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