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Letter for equipment manufacturer

Dear Sir or Madam, This is Ajay from Milton locality. I have been a regular customer to you shop - The technology store which sells electronic and communication equipment. Iam writing this to let you know that, I have recently purchased a cisco wireless router for my home office setup. It was found to be faulty. I am trying to setup the device everything was working good from hardware prespective. On the contrary, It seems to be issue with software as device firmware not being upgraded and turns out to be outdated piece of code. Let me explain the situation, This is being affecting my regular business operations. Iam unable to perform my offical tasks since network connectivity is the primary requirement for the current job as multiple applications are dependent on the same. Moreover, the current internet which will not allow to connect multiple devices as a result it had impact on productivity. It would be great if you can replace existing device with new one as this one is covered under warranty. As i cannot travel now due to my busy schedules, I would like to ship the device to my home address and provide support for Installation and configuration for the same. Looking forward to hearing from you soon, Yours faithfully, Ajay Kumar Elgum.
Dear Sir or Madam,

This is Ajay from Milton locality. I have been a regular customer to you shop
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
-
The technology store which sells electronic and communication equipment.

Possible spelling mistake found.
Iam
writing this to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
you know that, I have recently
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchased
a
Possible spelling mistake found.
cisco
wireless router for my home office setup.

It
was found
to be faulty. I am trying
The verb 'set up' is spelled as two words. The noun 'setup' is spelled as one.
to setup
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
device
everything was working
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
from hardware
Possible spelling mistake found.
prespective
.
On the contrary
, It seems to be issue with software as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
device
firmware not
being upgraded
and turns out to
be outdated
piece of code.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Let
me
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
the situation, This is being affecting my regular business operations.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Iam
unable to perform my
Possible spelling mistake found.
offical
tasks since network connectivity is the primary requirement for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
job as multiple applications are dependent on the same.
Moreover
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
internet which will not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
Did you mean "connecting"? Or maybe you should add a pronoun? In active voice, 'allow' + 'to' takes an object, usually a pronoun.
to connect
multiple
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
devices
as a result
it had impact on productivity.

It would be great if you can replace existing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
device
with new one as this one
is covered
under warranty.

As
Did you mean "I"?
i
cannot travel
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
due to my busy schedules, I would like to ship the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
device
to my home address and provide support for Installation and configuration for the same.

Looking forward to hearing from you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
,

Yours
faithfully
,

Ajay Kumar
Possible spelling mistake found.
Elgum
.
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IELTS letter Letter for equipment manufacturer

Letter
  American English
10 paragraphs
217 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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