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friend you made while you were studying abroad has written to ask you for help in finding a job in your country. You have heard about a job in a local company that might be suitable for him/her. v.1

Dear Jean, I am so glad to hear from you after such a decade of time since we both graduated in University. I'm happy to see your post in facebook that you've visited a lot of beautiful countries with your family. You've mentioned that you are interested to work here in Saudi Arabia and so we can meet each other. I'm so excited to see you soon. Well, actually upon receiving your email, I started to search for a vacant job. Surprisingly, there is a hospital newly opened here in Jeddah where im living hiring for ICU nurse. With number of years of experience I'm sure you are qualified in this job. . . . Here's the website www. kfsh. sa. gov. Don't forget to send your resume as soon as possible. Goodluck! And I'm looking forward to meeting you soon. Warm Wishes, Ayesha
Dear Jean,

I am
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
glad to hear from you after such a decade of time since we both
The verb ‘to graduate’ requires the preposition ‘from’: “graduated from”.
graduated
in University. I'm happy to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
your post
The usual collocation for “facebook” is “on”. Did you mean “on facebook”?
in facebook
that you've visited
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
countries with your family. You've mentioned that you
are interested
to work here in Saudi
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
Arabia and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
each other. I'm
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
excited to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
.

Well, actually upon receiving your email, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to search for a vacant job.
Surprisingly
, there is a hospital
newly
opened here in Jeddah where
Possible spelling mistake found.
im
living hiring for ICU nurse. With number of years of experience I'm sure you
are qualified
in this job.
Don’t put a space before the full stop.
.
Don’t put a space before the full stop.
.
Don’t put a space before the full stop.
.


Here's the website
Possible spelling mistake found.
www
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter.
kfsh
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter.
sa
. gov. Don't forget to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
your resume as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
as possible.

Possible spelling mistake found.
Goodluck
! And I'm looking forward to meeting you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
.

Warm Wishes,

Ayesha

IELTS letter friend you made while you were studying abroad has written to ask you for help in finding a job in your country. You have heard about a job in a local company that might be suitable for him/her. v. 1

Letter
  American English
7 paragraphs
143 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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