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Asking advise informal letter to asking advise from friend

Asking advise informal letter to asking advise from friend lqRgK
Dear Pam, Sorry that I haven’t written for ages, but I’ve been very busy studying. I’m writing because I need your advice about a problem I have. My friends and I have decided to go away on holiday in the summer, but I don’t have enough money. I was wondering if you had any ideas about earning some extra cash. If I don’t save up enough money by August, I’ll have to go away with my parents instead. Can you think of anything that would help me to make some money quickly? What would you advise me to do? Please write back as soon as you can. Love, Mary
Dear Pam,

Sorry that I haven’t written for ages,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I’ve been
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
busy studying. I’m writing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
I need your advice about a problem I have.

My friends and I have decided to go away on holiday in the summer,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I don’t have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
money. I was wondering if you had any
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
about earning
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
extra cash. If I don’t save up
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
money by August, I’ll
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
go away with my parents
instead
. Can you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
of anything that would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
me to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
money
quickly
?

What would you advise me to do?
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Please
write back as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
as you can.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Love
,

Mary
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IELTS letter Asking advise informal letter to asking advise from friend

Letter
  American English
6 paragraphs
108 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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