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A letter to suggest a subject to your cousin

A letter to suggest a subject to your cousin joaoy
Hello Ellen, I hope this letter finds you well. I’m glad to hear from you. Congratulations to your achievement and welcome to the new adventure in university. As a new graduate from university, I hope to share some helpful information with you. On the one hand, many of my fiends tend to study business because they said it’s easy to find a job after graduation. Also, learning business might bring a lot of benefit to your start-up business if you plan to have one. On the other hand, music is a creative subject, which is very challenge for people without basic knowledge. As I known, students who study music in universities are talented and have financial support from their families. However, for me, music is a magic medication for people’s mental. It can help you calm down and train your brain. Overall, I think both of subjects are essential for our society, but you should be clear what your goal is and which career you are gonna pursue in the future. Besides, if you want to study music, you should evaluate your skills and financial status in advance. I hope my suggestions can help you make a decision. I wish you all the best moving forward to next stage. Kind Regards, Tom
Hello Ellen,

I hope this letter finds you well. I’m glad to hear from you. Congratulations to your achievement and welcome to the new adventure in university.

As a new graduate from university, I hope to share
some
helpful information with you. On the one hand,
many
of my fiends tend to study business
because
they said it’s easy to find a job after graduation.
Also
, learning business might bring
a lot of
benefit to your
start
-up business if you plan to have one.

On the other hand
,
music
is a creative subject, which is
very
challenge for
people
without basic knowledge. As I
known
, students who study
music
in universities
are talented
and have financial support from their families.
However
, for me,
music
is a magic medication for
people
’s mental. It can
help
you calm down and train your brain.

Overall
, I
think
both of subjects are essential for our society,
but
you should be
clear
what your goal is and which career you are
gonna
pursue in the future.
Besides
, if you want to study
music
, you should evaluate your
skills
and financial status in advance.

I hope my suggestions can
help
you
make
a decision. I wish you all the best moving forward to
next
stage.

Kind Regards,

Tom
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IELTS letter A letter to suggest a subject to your cousin

Letter
  American English
8 paragraphs
211 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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