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1/ Write a letter to your manager about your work from last year. Include

1/ Write a letter to your manager about your work from last year. Include wnKKq
Dear Ms. Mirada, I am writing this letter with regard to the sales of Real Fruit bubble tea store in Sheppard Yonge Centre in last year as a manager store and my plan how I would do to improve it. In 2020, because of Covid-19, most of stores in Sheppard-Yonge Centre were closed. Although our store still opened for take-out, the number of customers dramatically decreased. In fact, even though our store did not get a loss for last year, we had to deal with many difficulties and the profit of this location was much lower than other locations in Toronto. For this year, 2021, I have the plan to introduce some new bubble tea drinks and give loyal customers some promotions. When I work at this location, I find out that this location has the strength of smoothie and slush drinks, but bubble tea is not special and the sale is very low. New bubble tea drinks can attract more customers to visit. Also, I want to apply the point card system in this location, customer can collect the point when they purchase drinks and redeem the point for the next time visiting. I got the email for management of training from the company, I was wondering if it would be at all possible to accept me to join. I want to learn more about management skills and get essential experiences. I look forward to receiving your response. Huong.
Dear Ms.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Mirada
,

I am writing this letter with regard to the sales of Real Fruit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bubble
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tea
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
store
in Sheppard
Possible spelling mistake found.
Yonge
Possible spelling mistake. 'Centre' is British English.
Centre
in last year as a manager
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
store
and my plan how I would do to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
it.

In 2020,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of Covid-19, most of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stores
in
Possible spelling mistake found.
Sheppard-Yonge
Possible spelling mistake. 'Centre' is British English.
Centre
were closed
. Although our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
store
still
opened for take-out, the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
dramatically
decreased. In fact,
even though
our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
store
did not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a loss for last year, we had to deal with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
difficulties and the profit of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
location
was much lower than other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
locations
in Toronto.

For this year, 2021, I have the plan to introduce
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bubble
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tea
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
and give loyal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
promotions. When I work at this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
location
, I find out that this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
location
has the strength of smoothie and slush
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bubble
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tea
is not special and the sale is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
low. New
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bubble
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tea
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
can attract more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customers
to visit.
Also
, I want to apply the point card system in this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
location
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
customer
can collect the point when they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drinks
and redeem the point for the
next
time visiting.

I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
the email for management of training from the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
, I was wondering if it would be at all possible to accept me to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
. I want to learn more about management
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
essential experiences.

Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
look forward to receiving your response.

Possible spelling mistake found.
Huong
.
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IELTS letter 1/ Write a letter to your manager about your work from last year. Include

Letter
  American English
7 paragraphs
240 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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