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Your city is trying to construct a new building in order to attract more tourists. Which do you think would be the best tourist attraction? A historical museum A shopping mall An indoor amusement park Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. Make sure to use your own words. Do not use memorized examples.

Your city is trying to construct a new building in order to attract more tourists. Which do you think would be the best tourist attraction? A historical museum A shopping mall An indoor amusement park Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. Make sure to use your own words. Do not use memorized examples. r1226
Today, cities are developing and constructing new things to attract tourists and increase their economy and their status in the world. If my City is establishing a new building, It should lure people of other countries to visit my City. Moreover, I think that it must be something that other countries do not have, so building a historical museum would be a great idea. I feel this for several reasons, which I will explore in the following essay. First and Foremost, Historical Museum attracts more tourists because the things inside the museum have their value, and it is not present in their own country. For Example, Last week, I saw a documentary about the museum of Paris; they showed that they built two new museums related to their ancient buildings and culture. Furthermore, they presented the things in a museum in a pretty creative way; they compared the things used in the past with today's things. It created a buzz in the news, and it lures more and more tourists to visit the museum. Moreover, many people visiting this museum were not even bothered with the pricey ticket, through this museum city is making much money. Here, the historical museum gives the people much knowledge about the ancient and even helps the City financially. Secondly, Building museum is way better than malls, and theme parks as every country have many shopping malls and parks. For instance, Last year, I went to Singapore, there were many theme parks, but we were bored after a while, as there was nothing else to do. However, a resident told us that Singapore is no longer a tourist attraction as the mayor of the City is destroyed. It is its museum, and people who love art and history avoid coming here as City has no historical things to see, affecting the City economically. Moreover, they are now building new historical places to attract some people. Even the City has parks and malls; they can not take place the ancient historical buildings. Finally, to sum up, I believe that historical museum has its value and respect and it can lure tourists to visit any city compared to malls and parks.
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Today
,
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cities
are developing and constructing
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new
things to attract
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tourists
and increase their economy and their status in the world. If my City is establishing a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
, It should lure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
of other
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countries
to visit my City.
Moreover
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be something that other
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countries
do not have,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
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building
a
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historical
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museum
would be a great
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idea
. I feel this for several reasons, which I will explore in the following essay.

First
and Foremost,
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Historical
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Museum
attracts more
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tourists
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the things inside the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
have their value, and it is not present in their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
For Example
, Last week, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
a documentary about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
of Paris; they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
that they built two
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new
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museums
related to their ancient
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buildings
and culture.
Furthermore
, they presented the things in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
in a pretty creative way; they compared the things
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in the past with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's things. It created a buzz in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
, and it lures more and more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
to visit the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
.
Moreover
,
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many
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people
visiting this
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museum
were not even bothered with the pricey ticket, through this
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museum
city is making much money. Here, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
historical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
gives the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
much knowledge about the ancient and even
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
the City
financially
.

Secondly
,
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Building
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museum
is way better than
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malls
, and theme
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parks
as every
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country
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
shopping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
malls
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parks
.
For instance
, Last year, I went to Singapore, there were
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
theme
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parks
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
we
were bored
after a while, as there was nothing else to do.
However
, a resident
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
told
us that Singapore is no longer a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourist
attraction as the mayor of the City is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroyed
. It is its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
, and
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people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
art and history avoid coming here as City has no
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
historical
things to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
, affecting the City
economically
.
Moreover
, they are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
building
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
historical
places to attract
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. Even the City has
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parks
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
malls
; they can not take place the ancient
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
historical
buildings.

Finally
, to sum up, I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
historical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
museum
has its value and respect and it can lure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
to visit any city compared to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
malls
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parks
.
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IELTS essay Your city is trying to construct a new building in order to attract more tourists. Which do you think would be the best tourist attraction? A historical museum A shopping mall An indoor amusement park Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. Make sure to use your own words. Do not use memorized examples.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
364 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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  • Your city is trying to construct a new building in order to attract more tourists. Which do you think would be the best tourist attraction? A historical museum A shopping mall An indoor amusement park Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. Make sure to use your own words. Do not use memorized examples.