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Young people spend less of their free time with their family nowadays. What are the reasons for this? Are there more negative or positive sides?

Young people spend less of their free time with their family nowadays. What are the reasons for this? Are there more negative or positive sides? Lr8bK
It has been seen recently that youngsters do not devote enough time with their family members. The main reasons are technology and social media. In my opinion, there is a negative side because it may have dangerous repercussions on individuals and their loved ones. To begin with, technology and several social sites are becoming a barrier between relationships as people spend half of their time browsing Facebook, Instagram, and Snapchat. Because of social platforms masses are not fascinated by social interaction which makes them introvert. For example, the federation university revealed in the recent survey 85% of young people spend their leisure time on mobile phones rather than spending time with parents. Hence, there was increase in the psychology gap between family members and youngsters. Further, misunderstanding can badly influence a teenager’s mind. This is because when there is little or no interaction it will create doubts in the mind, as a result, the relationships become violent. Apart from this, by not investing time in family, young people will not be able to learn moral values such as cooperation, politeness, and sharing. Therefore, they cannot become a better person in society and feel isolated. To illustrate, the Time of India reported in a recent survey that 60% of men and women experienced relationship violence due to lack of interaction with family members. In conclusion, paying less attention to family members can lead to serious conflicts and it may harm the relationships. So, I believe that technology and social media is a boon to enhance knowledge which must be used wisely.
It has been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
recently that youngsters do not devote
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
members. The main reasons are technology and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
media. In my opinion, there is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
side
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it may have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
repercussions on individuals and their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
loved
ones.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, technology and several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
sites are becoming a barrier between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relationships
as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
spend half of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
browsing Facebook, Instagram, and Snapchat.
“Because” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Because
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
platforms masses are not fascinated by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
interaction which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
them introvert.
For example
, the federation university revealed in the recent survey 85% of young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
spend their leisure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on mobile phones
rather
than spending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with parents.
Hence
, there was increase in the psychology gap between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
members and youngsters.

Further
, misunderstanding can
badly
influence a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenager
’s mind. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
when there is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
or no interaction it will create doubts in the mind,
as a result
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relationships
become violent. Apart from this, by not investing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
, young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
will not be able to learn moral values such as cooperation, politeness, and sharing.
Therefore
, they cannot become a better person in society and feel isolated. To illustrate, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Time
of India reported in a recent survey that 60% of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
and women experienced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relationship
violence due to lack of interaction with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
members.

In conclusion
, paying less attention to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
members can lead to serious conflicts and it may harm the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relationships
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, I believe that technology and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
media is a boon to enhance knowledge which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
wisely
.
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IELTS essay Young people spend less of their free time with their family nowadays. What are the reasons for this? Are there more negative or positive sides?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
260 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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