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You work for an international company and would like to spend six months working in its head office in another country. Write a letter to your manager. In your letter • explain why you want to work in the company’s head office for six months. • v.3

You work for an international company and would like to spend six months working in its head office in another country. Write a letter to your manager. In your letter • explain why you want to work in the company’s head office for six months. • v. 3
Social networking usage in this modern era has some effects on persons and communities. For instance Facebook, it perhaps provides prodigious benefits for somebody, but I think the poor effect of it will be outweighing for humankind. Always be hanging on the social network, make some people more consider socializing in the networking instead of real life to keep their level of society, even though they are isolated and not recognized by the tangible communities. Because of that, they forget about their relatives who are the closest people and have a profound impact on their life. Furthermore, there are some poor pieces of information in social networking such as fake news, harassing statements, and inappropriate images. For some sensitive individuals, it can be damaging to mental and habits. To illustrate it, if someone watching a harmful video in social networking, they can be affected to resemble that act on it. On the other hand, social networking for young people who are unstable to observe something, it has various effects on them. It was not sporadic if they would not filter the entire social network offered. Owing to, we need to control social networking usage to diminish the negative impact of it. To conclude, the social networking site has some immense issues of persons and communities, if the way of using this media is not acceptable to value in life. Therefore, to communicate and socialize with it, we have to be wiser, think with a critical eye, and do not forget about the real-life colleagues as well.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Social
networking usage in this modern era has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
effects on persons and communities.
For instance
Facebook, it perhaps provides prodigious benefits for somebody,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
the poor effect of it will be outweighing for humankind.

Always be hanging on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
network,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
more consider socializing in the networking
instead
of real life to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
their level of society,
even though
they
are isolated
and not recognized by the tangible communities.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
of that, they forget about their relatives who are the closest
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
and have a profound impact on their life.

Furthermore
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
poor pieces of information in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
networking such as fake news, harassing statements, and inappropriate images. For
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
sensitive individuals, it can be damaging to mental and habits. To illustrate it, if someone watching a harmful video in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
networking, they can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
to resemble that act on it.
On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
networking for young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who are unstable to observe something, it has various effects on them. It was not sporadic if they would not filter the entire
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
network offered. Owing to, we need to control
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
networking usage to diminish the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact of it.

To conclude
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
networking site has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
immense issues of persons and communities, if the way of using this media is not acceptable to value in life.
Therefore
, to communicate and socialize with it, we
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
be wiser,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
with a critical eye, and do not forget about the real-life colleagues
as well
.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
One should not aim at being possible to understand but at being impossible to misunderstand.
Marcus Fabius Quintilian

IELTS essay You work for an international company and would like to spend six months working in its head office in another country. Write a letter to your manager. In your letter • explain why you want to work in the company’s head office for six months. • v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
256 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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