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You have heard that your company is organising a language training abroad for a limitednumber of participants. Write a letter of interest: -- state your position in your company- explain why they should include you in the training- explain how your trainin v.1

You have heard that your company is organising a language training abroad for a limitednumber of participants. Write a letter of interest: -- state your position in your company- explain why they should include you in the training- explain how your trainin v. 1
At the present, people all around the world probably go towards the most worrying threat called the global warming. Many reasons can be given to explain this phenomenon, which necessitates the implementation of appropriate measures to address it. There are several factors responsible for global warming, the most important of which relate to the emissions of CO2 and deforestation. As for the former, since the growth of industry, people could likely burn fossil fuel like coal, oil and gas to create electricity or power our cars, which leads to the fact that a large amount of CO2 is released into the atmosphere. According to the last report about serious environmental consequences of a scientist from Standford University, 70% of electricity coming from burning coal will release over 10 thousand of tonnes of CO2, which becomes one of the major causes of global warming. Moreover, humans clear vast areas of vegetation around the world for farming, urban and infrastructures development or to sell tree products like timber. Once the forest is removed or burned, the stored carbon is released back into the atmosphere, which contributes to global warming. Nevertheless, various measures can be taken to redress the situation. To begin with, the government can organize environmental education campaigns, which may help individuals enhance their awarenesses of an alarming level of environmental issues. By doing this, those would tend to live a more eco-friendly lifestyle that they use public transportations to travel instead of private vehicles. Another solution could be that the government should reduce our dependence on fossil fuels and promote alternatives. The renewable sources, including solar power, wind power and biodiesel seem to be a step in the right direction, therefore, government should encourage citizens to use these kinds of power in order to reduce the emissions of CO2. In conclusion, although global warming results from main causes such as an intense amounts of carbon dioxide that releases every day and deforestation, steps can be taken to alleviate this issue.
At the present,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
all around the world
probably
go towards the most worrying threat called the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
warming
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
reasons can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
this phenomenon, which necessitates the implementation of appropriate measures to address it.

There are several factors responsible for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
warming
, the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
of which relate to the emissions of CO2 and deforestation. As for the former, since the growth of industry,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
could likely burn fossil fuel like coal, oil and gas to create electricity or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
power
our cars, which leads to the fact that a large amount of CO2
is released
into the atmosphere. According to the last report about serious environmental consequences of a scientist from
Possible spelling mistake found.
Standford
University, 70% of electricity coming from burning coal will release over 10 thousand of tonnes of CO2, which becomes one of the major causes of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
warming
.
Moreover
, humans
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
vast areas of vegetation around the world for farming, urban and infrastructures development or to sell tree products like timber. Once the forest
is removed
or burned, the stored carbon
is released
back into the atmosphere, which contributes to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
warming.

Nevertheless
, various measures can
be taken
to redress the situation. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
can organize environmental education campaigns, which may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
individuals enhance their
Possible spelling mistake found.
awarenesses
of an alarming level of environmental issues. By doing this, those would tend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
a more eco-friendly lifestyle that they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
public transportations to travel
instead
of private vehicles. Another solution could be that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
our dependence on fossil fuels and promote alternatives. The renewable sources, including solar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
power
, wind
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
power
and biodiesel seem to be a step in the right direction,
therefore
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should encourage citizens to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
these kinds of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
power
in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the emissions of CO2.

In conclusion
, although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
warming
results from main causes such as an intense
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "amount"?
amounts
of carbon dioxide that releases every day and deforestation, steps can
be taken
to alleviate this issue.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
One who speaks only one language is one person, but one who speaks two languages is two people.
Turkish proverb

IELTS essay You have heard that your company is organising a language training abroad for a limitednumber of participants. Write a letter of interest: -- state your position in your company- explain why they should include you in the training- explain how your trainin v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
330 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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