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Writing task 2 test 3 paper 13

Writing task 2 test 3 paper 13 GLjlo
Human civilisation has a long and strong historical foundation, and that cannot be ignored. For instance, the discovery or the invention of the wheel are significant landmarks in the human history. Many of today’s technological and scientific advancements are possible due to these discoveries and inventions. History does not only relate to these. It can also be categorised into many types – such as, political history, scientific history and human history, as stated above. Many of these are essential in our lives. Science and Technology are important for the advancement of the human race and civilisation. However, every idea needs a base to stand on before its execution. For example, if a scientist does not know about the makings of dynamite by Alfred Noble, they will not be able to apply its usefulness to their projects. They should also know the pros and cons of the object to safeguard its exploitation. However, the history of science and technology is still regarded as one of high importance. Some people argue about the significance of political and human history. Many would consider this insignificant nowadays. It is to be noted that knowing the history of mankind is essential for building a better future. For example, young people should learn about the Holocaust and the history of slavery in order to empathise with the past and help make a better future, where such discriminations are eradicated completely. Learning about the history of colonialism in the developing countries will help the young generation to act accordingly and fill in the gaps left by the colonisers. In conclusion, History as a subject should be taught alongside Science and Technology. While the latter mentioned subjects help us go forward, the former enables us to determine a yardstick for possible outcomes.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Human
Possible spelling mistake. 'civilisation' is British English.
civilisation
has a long and strong historical foundation, and that cannot be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignored
.
For instance
, the discovery or the invention of the wheel are significant landmarks in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s technological and scientific advancements are possible due to these discoveries and inventions.

History does not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
relate to these. It can
also
be
Possible spelling mistake. 'categorised' is British English.
categorised
into
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
types
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
–
such as, political
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
, scientific
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
, as stated above.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
of these are essential in our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. Science and Technology are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for the advancement of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
race and
Possible spelling mistake. 'civilisation' is British English.
civilisation
.
However
, every
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
needs a base to stand on
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
its execution.
For example
, if a scientist does not know about the makings of dynamite by Alfred Noble, they will not be able to apply its usefulness to their projects. They should
also
know the pros and cons of the object to safeguard its exploitation.

However
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
of science and technology is
still
regarded as one of high importance.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
argue about the significance of political and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
would consider this insignificant nowadays. It is to
be noted
that knowing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
of mankind is essential for building a better future.
For example
, young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
should learn about the Holocaust and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
of slavery in order to
Possible spelling mistake. 'empathise' is British English.
empathise
with the past and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a better future, where such discriminations
are eradicated
completely. Learning about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
of colonialism in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developing countries
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
the young generation to act
accordingly
and fill in the gaps
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
by the
Possible spelling mistake. 'colonisers' is British English.
colonisers
.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
History
as a subject should
be taught
alongside Science and Technology. While the latter mentioned subjects
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us go forward, the former enables us to determine a yardstick for possible outcomes.
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IELTS essay Writing task 2 test 3 paper 13

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
294 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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