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Writing Task 2 Free Write

Writing Task 2 Free Write d3mp2
Aging society is one of the pressing issues in many countries are facing. As the number of the older population rises, more elders consider living in a nursing home where they can be taken care of by nurses and professional workers. Traditionally, family are responsible for this payment but in my opinion, government should also contribute to this payment as it is part of the country's welfare. Choosing to live in a nursing home is a decision made by both the elder and the family. However, it is important to acknowledge that the fee paid to the nursing home significantly affects this decision. In order to ensure that each family can consider their options freely, government needs to control the price of living in a nursing home and standardizing the quality and payment of each nursing home. Another point worth noting is that government should also invest in building and improving nursing homes so that elder citizens have can choose to live in a nursing home without any financial preoccupation. On the other hand, monthly subsidies can be paid directly to families with elders as part of the social welfare to help look after retired senior citizens. In Thailand, many families encourage grandparents to live together as a compound family in one house because they cannot afford the cost of a nursing home. Despite the lower cost paid when living together instead of going to nursing homes, the elders may not be able to receive the needed care and supervision in time at home. The issue can be resolved if government pay monthly subsidies to families and help lower the cost of living in a nursing home. In conclusion, going to live in a nursing home is a choice voluntary made by elders and their family. Nevertheless, in order to ensure the equal access to considering this choice, the cost of living in a nursing home should not be a burden to the elders or their family. Government should invest in subsidies for senior citizens as well as help maintain the quality and control fee of the nursing homes.
Aging society is one of the pressing issues in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries are facing. As the number of the older population rises, more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elders
consider
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in a nursing home where they can
be taken
care of by nurses and professional workers.
Traditionally
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
are responsible for this payment
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
in my opinion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should
also
contribute to this payment as it is part of the country's welfare. Choosing to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
in a nursing home is a decision made by both the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elder
and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
.
However
, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to acknowledge that the fee paid to the nursing home
significantly
affects this decision. In order to ensure that each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
can consider their options
freely
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
needs to control the price of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in a nursing home and standardizing the quality and payment of each nursing home. Another point worth noting is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should
also
invest in building and improving nursing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elder
citizens have can choose to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
in a nursing home without any financial preoccupation.
On the other hand
, monthly subsidies can
be paid
directly
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elders
as part of the social welfare to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
look after retired senior citizens. In Thailand,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
encourage grandparents to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
together as a compound
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
in one
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they cannot afford the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
of a nursing home. Despite the lower
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
paid when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
together
instead
of going to nursing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homes
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elders
may not be able to receive the needed care and supervision in time at home. The issue can
be resolved
if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
pay monthly subsidies to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
lower the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in a nursing home.
In conclusion
, going to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
in a nursing home is a choice voluntary made by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elders
and their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
.
Nevertheless
, in order to ensure the equal access to considering this choice, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
in a nursing home should not be a burden to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
elders
or their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
should invest in subsidies for senior citizens
as well
as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
maintain the quality and control fee of the nursing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
homes
.
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IELTS essay Writing Task 2 Free Write

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
349 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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