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Write an essay to give your opinion about the following statement: "Your personality doesn't change over time."

Write an essay to give your opinion about the following statement: "Your personality doesn't change over time. " 0ank1
From once upon a time to nowadays, people mostly believe that: “A leopard can’t change his spots”. This issue has been being debated for many years. In my opinion, I disagree absolutely with the notion that your traits maintain forever. In the following paragraphs I’m going to show my arguments to support my views. On one hand, humankind from coming into the world to death that is always to have many diverse periods. Personality is a consistent combination which is formed and changed over time. It is influenced by many elements around you. Firstly, about your family and parent. You grow up in your family and have to be impacted by rearing, personality and behavior of your parent. When you were child, you couldn’t be conscious of something and you had to play the ape from parent. For instance, a family includes father and mother who constantly scold and have evil treatment, consequently children become rude and bad behavior. But when they come of age, they have enough about self-image, they will change themselves. It is the reason why someone’s demeanour will be distinct at age 30 as it was age 15. In addition to this, not only this but also peers, cowokers or external agents on the whole it is circumstance of society. About peers, like I observed that: If you often have some friends who are loquacious, no long after you will become chatty than before. In particular, cowoker-pressure makes you have to alter yourself. In this society always exists many struggles. Your jobs too afftect on fashioning your character, both in dealing with coworker and in dealing with boss. Employer will reject you if your personality is not satisfiable with work. Therefore you demand to change your personality trait. This will be useful for you continue to get along with your job. In conclusion, there is no doubt that personality transforms over time because of influencing from parent, peers, coworker and other variables. Is it advantageous that you eliminate negative personality traits than you retain them? You can learn some new tricks.
From once upon a time to nowadays,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
mostly
believe that: “A leopard can’t
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
his spots”. This issue has been
being debated
for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
years. In my opinion, I disagree
absolutely
with the notion that your traits maintain forever. In the following paragraphs I’m going to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
my arguments to support my views.

On one hand, humankind from coming into the world to death
that is
always to have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
diverse periods.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Personality
is a consistent combination which
is formed
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
over time. It
is influenced
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
elements around you.
Firstly
, about your family and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parent
. You grow up in your family and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
be impacted
by rearing,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personality
and behavior of your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parent
. When you were child, you couldn’t be conscious of something and you had to play the ape from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parent
.
For instance
, a family includes father and mother who
constantly
scold and have evil treatment,
consequently
children become rude and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
behavior.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
when they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
of age, they have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
about self-image, they will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
themselves. It is the reason why someone’s
Possible spelling mistake found.
demeanour
will be distinct at age 30 as it was age 15.

In addition
to this, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
this
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
peers,
Possible spelling mistake found.
cowokers
or external agents
on the whole
it is circumstance of society. About peers, like I observed that: If you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
friends who are loquacious, no long after you will become
Use "chattier" to make a comparison with this adjective.
chatty
than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
.
In particular
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
cowoker-pressure
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
alter yourself. In this society always exists
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
struggles. Your jobs too
Possible spelling mistake found.
afftect
on fashioning your character, both in dealing with coworker and in dealing with boss. Employer will reject you if your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personality
is not
Possible spelling mistake found.
satisfiable
with work.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Therefore
you demand to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personality
trait. This will be useful for you continue to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
along with your job.

In conclusion
, there is no doubt that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personality
transforms over time
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of influencing from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parent
, peers, coworker and other variables. Is it advantageous that you eliminate
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personality
traits than you retain them? You can learn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
new tricks.
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IELTS essay Write an essay to give your opinion about the following statement: "Your personality doesn't change over time. "

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
345 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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