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Write an essay discussing two ways that sport can benefit people.

Write an essay discussing two ways that sport can benefit people. BJ7y5
Sport is crucially important for our well-being and health. It is undoubtedly true that sports activities have many assets and are hence beneficial for the majority of the population on Earth. Recently, there has been a discussion concerning the benefits that people can get from doing sport. Therefore, I have decided to set out two benefits which people can get from the sport. The first important benefit that cannot be omitted is that sport contributes to building and strengthening community spirit. According to one study, those people who regularly take part in any sports matches are more likely to succeed in their future career since they have better collaborative skills at their disposal. Moreover, they are also much better at coming to grips with making hard decisions in a really short period of time. Team sports have never been as important as nowadays. Not only do they help everyone to become a better negotiator, but they also teach every person the skill of being able to reach a consensus. As far as I am concerned, those sports where cooperation is necessary can teach us to become more considerate to each other. It goes without saying that our emotions and feelings can have a detrimental effect on our personality. However, if we can control them to a certain extent, they are very useful. By doing regular exercise, it is ensured that the body hormones, which are accountable for our emotions are balanced. Thus, we are much more efficient at work and have a clearer mind. In conclusion, I cannot state which one of these two benefits is more important since I am deeply convinced that both of them are vitally important. Human beings are reliant on others since communication and teamwork are our innate skills. However, releasing emotions is also crucial as they help us to cope with stress.
Sport
is
crucially
important
for our well-being and health. It is
undoubtedly
true that
sports
activities have
many
assets and are
hence
beneficial for the majority of the population on Earth. Recently, there has been a discussion concerning the
benefits
that
people
can
get
from doing
sport
.
Therefore
, I have decided to set out two
benefits
which
people
can
get
from the sport.

The
first
important
benefit
that cannot
be omitted
is that
sport
contributes to building and strengthening community spirit. According to one study, those
people
who
regularly
take part
in any
sports
matches are more likely to succeed in their future career since they have better collaborative
skills
at their disposal.
Moreover
, they are
also
much better at coming to grips with making
hard
decisions in a
really
short period of time. Team
sports
have never been as
important
as nowadays. Not
only
do they
help
everyone to become a better negotiator,
but
they
also
teach every person the
skill
of being able to reach a consensus. As far as I
am concerned
, those
sports
where cooperation is necessary can teach us to become more considerate to each other.

It goes without saying that our emotions and feelings can have a detrimental effect on our personality.
However
, if we can control them to a certain extent, they are
very
useful. By doing regular exercise, it
is ensured
that the body hormones, which are accountable for our emotions
are balanced
.
Thus
, we are much more efficient at work and have a clearer mind.

In conclusion
, I cannot state which one of these two
benefits
is more
important
since I am
deeply
convinced that both of them are
vitally
important
. Human beings are reliant on others since communication and teamwork are our innate
skills
.
However
, releasing emotions is
also
crucial as they
help
us to cope with
stress
.
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IELTS essay Write an essay discussing two ways that sport can benefit people.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
308 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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