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Write about your personal perspectives in a paragraph.

Write about your personal perspectives in a paragraph. 3gMOX
Every human has a different personal perspectives of the future. From my point of view future will be better than now. I’m awaiting a more prosperous moment that see my children happy. If they success, I will be satisfied. I always have been an industrious woman. I have been trying so hard to make better life since I was 18 years old. Now, I'm in my forties. So, I have the opportunity to pursue my interests. As a result, I decided to continue learning English to achieve my dream of fluent English conversation. Then, I travel all over Iran and around the world, the only thing I have not done in my life completely and I owe it to myself. I hope I can speak English well.
Every human has a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
personal
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "perspective"?
perspectives
of the future. From my point of view future will be better than
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
.

I’m awaiting a more prosperous moment that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
my children happy. If
Do not use a noun immediately after the pronoun 'they'. Use a verb or an adverb, or possibly some other part of speech.
they success
, I will
be satisfied
.

I always have been an industrious woman. I have been trying
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
better life since I was 18 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Now
, I'm in my forties.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, I have the opportunity to pursue my interests.

As a result
, I decided to continue learning English to achieve my dream of fluent English conversation.

Then, I travel all over Iran and around the world, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
thing I have not done in my life completely and I owe it to myself. I hope I can speak English well.
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IELTS essay Write about your personal perspectives in a paragraph.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
127 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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